Forbidden Desires
by April231
Summary: Bella's parents and the Cullens have had problems for years. They refuse to even go to the hospital that Dr. Carlisle Cullen works at. But what happens when Bella starts to fall in love with their son, Edward?
1. Chapter 1

"Happy Birthday!!!!"

I blushed and looked at the people that had just shouted at me, my parents and my best friend Alice. I smiled broadly to show my gratitude and hugged Alice. She was the real mastermind behind this surprise party I was sure. I was now 17 but I didn't feel much different than I did yesterday when I was only 16.

"Thank you" I stammered quietly too embarrassed to say any more than that.

"Come on Bella open your presents," my mother encouraged almost as excited as Alice was. Of course nobody could get as excited as her but my mom definitely gave her a run for her money. We gathered in our decent size living room with me in the center on the love seat. Alice put a huge pile of presents in front of me to my utter horror. I hated when people gave me presents but on my birthday I had to pretend I didn't mind.

"Aw thank you" I said again stupidly. I grabbed the first one I could lay my hand on and it said from mom and dad on the top. I looked up and smiled at them. My mom looked like she was about to burst with suspense my father just looked proudly at me. I opened the outer paper and held a little box. When I removed the lid I saw the most beautiful necklace I had ever seen. I could feel the tears pooling in my eyes. I got up and threw my arms around my parents. "Thank you so much." I said to them. My father kissed my cheek and I sat back down. After that I was starting to actually look forward to opening the rest of the presents. After all the presents were opened I walked to the dining room assuming next they would want to give me a cake. Instead they stayed in the living room awkwardly quiet as if waiting for something. When the bell rang I realized they intended this to be just a small family celebration. My friends from school poured in the door and ran over to hug me. Well at least they didn't have presents with them.

"Surprise" Alice said coming over to my side. She guided everyone to the backyard where I was shocked to see my parents had a hired a DJ.

"This all really isn't necessary I mean I'm only 17" I complained to Alice.

"Oh come on did you actually expect me to just have a small party for my best friend."

I hated when she said things like that it always made me feel bad for not being more grateful which I'm sure she was aware of. She dragged me to the dance floor that was also set up and gave the DJ the go ahead. I swayed to the music looking around me to see who had shown up. I saw my friends Jessica and Angela from school and Mike who I'm sure has had a crush on me since we were in middle school. I would have to avoid him tonight. After a while I actually relaxed and didn't feel so self-conscious. I walked over to the table with snacks and drinks to get some soda. I noticed Mike heading over and tried to think of a way to escape but I was too late.  
"Hey happy birthday" Mike said giving me a hug. I didn't miss how he held on a little longer than was necessary.

"Thanks" I said sheepishly and looked at my shoes.  
"This is a really great party thanks for inviting me"

"Don't thank me Alice was the one who planned everything" I looked around to give her a dirty look but I couldn't find her so I returned to looking at my shoes.

"Well uh…" he seemed nervous of what he was about to say which didn't make me feel any better. "I know the invitation said no presents but I bought you a little some." Great. Any hope I had they Mike had gotten over his puppy love for me were dashed. "Here" he said quickly thrusting out his hand dropping a bracelet into my outstretched hand. It wasn't expensive thank god but it wasn't junky either. I smiled at him and leaned over for an awkward hug.

"Thanks. This is really pretty." I put it on to show him that I really liked which I hoped he didn't take as a message that I wanted more than friendship from him.

"Bella!" I looked over and saw Alice waving at me. Oh she is such a great friend saving me from having to say something to Mike that could hurt his feeling. This wasn't the first time she had done that either.

"Thanks again for the bracelet," I said and hurriedly walked over to Alice.

"I see Mike still isn't over you."

"Yeah it looks like it." I didn't want to be mean to Mike he just wasn't the guy I wanted to go out with.

"Soo how do you like the party?" She asked me knowing obviously the answer already.

"Alright I admit…" but I didn't finish my thought because I had just spotted someone I never thought I would see here tonight. The most exquisitely handsome boy I had ever laid my eyes on and the absolute most forbidden.

"What?" Alice asked clearly getting nervous.

"Edward Cullen is here"


	2. Chapter 2

"Edward Cu... but I thought your parents didn't like the Cullens."

"They don't!" I whispered trying frantically to come up with a reason as to why the son of my parent's worst enemies would be at my 17th birthday party. That's when he spotted me and began to walk over. My heart kicked into overdrive and I look desperately at Alice for something to do. She grabbed my arm and began pulling me quickly towards the other side of the yard.

"You go distract your parents; I'll go see what he wants here." I nodded too bewildered to actually say anything. I turned to search for them and saw my dad coming out the back door. I rushed over to him; this was good he would be the angrier of my parents if they saw a Cullen here. Even if it was the son of said people not the people themselves. The amazingly handsome son of those people. No! I couldn't think that even if it was true, my parents would never allow me to spend time with Edward let alone go out with him.

"Hey dad," I greeted smoothly acting just as I would have otherwise. "Thanks for doing all this for me."

"Oh your welcome Bells, you really deserve it." Swiftly I looked over and saw Alice with Edward and they appeared to be arguing about something. Finally he sighed and started to walk to the back door just when my mother was walking out of it.

"Wait!!" I rushed over and grabbed Edward by his arm before my mom even saw him. "What are you trying to do start a family feud?" Before he could answer I turned to look for Alice. She was right behind and I nearly screamed with relief. "My mom and dad are out they're going to see him any second…"

Alice grabbed my shoulders "Ok, Bella calm down its ok."

"Excuse me," Edward said calmly.

I glared at him. To think he had the nerve to talk to me after crashing my party and making me scramble to be sure my parents don't see him. That would cause a scene that would definitely ruin the rest of my high school existence. I shuddered inwardly waiting for Edward to continue whatever he was about to say

"I didn't mean to cause trouble it's just…"

"Well that's what you did and you need to get out of here right now!"Alice cut him off. For a second I felt bad for him, maybe he actually was here to just say happy birthday. It wasn't his fault that our parents didn't get along with each other. However that feeling was soon gone when I saw my mom heading over this way and I knew I was seconds from her seeing Edward. I grabbed his arm again and shoved him to the floor.

"Under the table," I ordered him and quickly straightened up to smile at my mom.

"Is everything ok?" she asked. "I know you weren't expecting this but your father and I thought you would really enjoy it.

"No, it's great mom." _Of course it would be even better if I wasn't hiding Edward Cullen under the table and trying to figure out a way to get him out of here without you finding out_, I thought. My mom kissed me on my forehead then walked over to my dad to help with throw some garbage away. This was the only moment I would have so I quickly yanked Edward back to his feet and sprinted over to the back door. I noticed Mike giving us a dirty look. I guess he didn't realize this was Edward because then he wouldn't feel nearly as threatened, not that he had a right to be threatened. Everyone in town knew that the Cullens and the Swans were complete enemies. One of the disadvantages of living in a small town. We got to the front door and I threw it open.

"Bye!" I was about to slam the door in his face when he turned to smile at me.

"Happy Birthday Isabella Swan." Then he just turned and strode slowly down the driveway. Huh? That was really odd. I still couldn't come up with any kind of logical reason that Edward Cullen would want to be at my party. I mean I never even said two words to him. He was in one of my classes at school and my lunch. And of course I noticed him any girl that wasn't blind couldn't help but notice him. But I always knew he was off limits so I didn't think about him much, at all really. So I was completely lost as to why he would suddenly show up at my party. How would he even know about it anyway? Well, again I live in a small town I guess it's not hard to find out about a kid's birthday party and when and where it is. I heard someone coming up behind me.

"Is he gone?" Alice asked beside me and I turned to her.

"Yeah but..." I wasn't sure if I should tell her how much I was confused by Edward's sudden appearance here.

"What?"

"Never mind let's just get back to the party." But all I could think about the whole time was the way Edward looked at me right before he walked away. Eventually everyone left and of course Alice was the last to go but that didn't bother me I didn't mind spending extra time with her. She hugged me and said happy birthday once again and finally it was just my parents and me. They were lying on the couch together and I could tell my mom was almost asleep. I gently sat down next to my parents and watched TV.

"That necklace really looks beautiful on you." Instinctively I brought my hand up and played with it between my fingers.

"Thank you and thanks for getting it but you know you didn't have to do all this for me."

"Eh your only 17 once you might as well enjoy it." I smiled at him and got up to go to bed.

"Goodnight."

"Night, Bella." I walked up the stairs finally starting to feel exhaustion creep up on me. First though I went to the bathroom and brushed my teeth and changed into my pajamas. I took the bracelet off and looked at it for a second. I would really have to say something to Mike soon about us. I tried being subtle but he obviously wasn't taking the hint. I walked to my bedroom and put the bracelet in one of my desk drawers. I laid down and almost instantly fell into a deep sleep. I dreamt of Edward Cullen that night.


	3. Chapter 3

I woke up the next morning feeling thoroughly rested. It was Friday so I still had to go to school but when I looked out the window I was amazed to see there was some sun. Not much but it was better than the usual all clouds weather. I dressed in some of the new clothes I'd gotten yesterday for my birthday and went downstairs for some breakfast. I just had a quick bowl of cereal because when I looked at my clock I noticed I actually slept a few minutes too late. That was unusual most of the time I woke up with lots of time to spare. I must have been having a good dream.

"Better hurry Bell you're going to be late." My dad was leaving too so he walked with me out to my truck. My mom was still sleeping I'm sure she tended to lie in bed until around 10. "Have a good day."

"You too," I got in my truck and immediately put the heat on. It was surprisingly cold so I wouldn't get to enjoy the sun that much. I guess that was nature's way of keeping balance. We got a break from the rain and clouds but still had to deal with the chill. I easily got to school and pulled into a parking space. I grabbed my bag and got out, that's when I felt like someone was staring at me. The hair on the back of my neck stood up and I quickly turned to the left. Edward Cullen was standing by his car staring at me. What a creep this guy was turning out to be. I'd always assumed it was unjust for my parents to hate the Cullens the way they did. But if they were anything like the way their son is then I was beginning to rethink that. Quickly I turned my back on him and walked into the school. My first class was science and I sat down next to Angela.

"Hey," I whispered to her.

"Hey," she smiled back and dug in her bag to get out her notebook. We had a substitute teacher so we didn't have an assignment to do. "Did I see Edward Cullen at your party yesterday?" I froze. How could she have seen him? The second I noticed he was there I got him out the door. He was there for all of maybe 10 minutes.

"Yeah. That was really strange."

"He's so cute though." Angela didn't usually gush over boys but it was hard to ignore Edward's good looks. I just smiled at her. I agreed with her of course but I was trying to think as little of Edward as possible. Although I wasn't exactly doing a great job of that since I couldn't seem to get the image of him looking at me from across the parking lot out of my head. The rest of the time went by quickly with me talking to Angela about various and random topics. She also had gotten me something even though the invite clearly said not to. Her doing it didn't bother me nearly as much as Mike doing it did. However that might have something to do with the fact that she didn't have any ulterior motive besides trying to make me happy. When the bell rang and tapped her on the shoulder

"Thanks for the scrap book. I really do like it."

She smiled and blushed a slight red. "You're welcome."

I walked slowly to my next class. I wasn't looking forward to it at all. Edward was in that class. I walked in cautiously and made sure to avert my eyes from his desk. I sat in the back next to an empty desk which I usually liked. However today I was scared that Edward might take up residence there for the hour we were here. I heard the door open and looked up hoping to see the teacher walk in. Big mistake, it was Edward and he zeroed in on the empty seat next to me. Without thinking before I acted I flung my bag over the seat and pushed one of my books on the top of the desk. Edward looked confused for a second. Then he smiled a crooked smile that nearly took my breath away and sat down in the desk two seats up and across from me. He wasn't as far as he usually sat but it was better than right next to me. I couldn't tell why I was acting so irrational about this whole thing. Maybe he wanted to be friends to try and end this silly feud our parents had. The idea was a noble one and I would have loved to participate. However I knew I was too big of a coward to be able to face my parents telling them I was friends with a Cullen.

"Ok guys today we're starting a project that will be due next Thursday. You're working in partners and I've already preselected them." The class groaned in unison me along with them. "It's very simple just pick a book you've read recently and make a collage using words and pictures to retell the story on poster board. Ok first partners, Jake and Bill. Mary and Jason. Isabella and Edward.

What?!

Was this some kind of joke? I had to work with _Edward_? I looked over at him and he grinned at me and started to gather his books and move over to the empty desk he was originally going for. Oh this could not be happening to me. How had I ended up being forced to work with a Cullen? Although suddenly the idea didn't seem that bad to me. Maybe doing this project together would actually be good for us. No! What was wrong with me? This was the boy I was told was a jerk my whole life. I still didn't know what was so bad about him but there had to be a reason my parents were so against me spending time with him. Didn't there? I was so confused and I felt a headache coming on when he sat gracefully down in the seat next to me.

"Hey partner."

"Hi." I answered not even bothering to look up at him. Every time I looked into his eyes I just got more confused.

"Ready to get busy?" I couldn't help myself that time. I cracked a small smile and looked up at him. "So do you want to come over my house this afternoon to start working on this?" I could have sworn my heart stopped. Well, then started beating out of control. Was he out of his mind? Go over to the Cullen's?!?! Being forced to work with Edward for a school project was going to be hard enough to explain to my parents. There was no way I would be able to tell them I was spending the afternoon at their house. As if he could read my mind he quickly added "don't worry my parents will be gone until late tonight." Well maybe I could go if nobody knew and I wouldn't actually be interacting with his parents.

"Ok I'll be there." Oh boy.

* * *

Thanks for reading!! Please review and let me know if you like the story. I'll try to get a chapter up every day or every other day if I can. Enjoy.


	4. Chapter 4

I pulled up to Edward's house using the directions he gave me. He lived in a huge house that was set back in the woods. I took a deep breath and got out of my truck. Edward came out and over to the truck when he heard me slam the door.  
"Nice house." I complimented dryly. I still wasn't quite sure why I had agreed to come. I told myself it was because I thought there might be a chance I could find out the truth about why our parents hated each other. In reality, however, it had something more to do with just spending time with Edward.

"Thanks" he said and we walked up the porch steps to the front door. The inside of the house was just as breathtaking as the outside. There was a big, open living room and off to the side I could just make out the kitchen.

"Wow," was the only thing I could think of to say just then. I heard Edward laugh lightly and he came over to take my coat. "So are you ready to work on the project?" I asked. I was trying to keep this just about school and not like an actual date. Although I had to admit the idea of dating Edward sometimes appealed strongly to me.

"Sure." "Do you want something to drink?"

"Yeah thanks, water would be fine." He walked in to the kitchen and I sat down on the couch and got out my notebook and the book we'd chosen to read. Well I'd chosen it and I was hoping he would go along with it. A second later he came out and handed me the water. I noticed he was drinking something red that frighteningly reminded me of blood "what's that?" It was hard for me to keep the disgust out of my voice.

"Fruit punch" he answered laughing at me once again. I rolled my eyes and pushed my unused notebook over to him.

"You have read Wuthering Heights before right?"

"Yeah. That's what you want to do the report on?" That got me angry and I immediately went on the defensive. Wuthering Heights was one of my favorite books.

"Yes and what's wrong with that?" He started to laugh then composed his face.

"Nothing, its fine let's get started." I wasn't convinced and I was still curious to why he seemed so against it at first but I switched my attention over to writing facts down on my notebook. We also had to go on his computer and try to find pictures that we could use to show some of the main occurrences in the book. About an hour later Edward shut the computer down and came over to me since I had moved back over to the couch to start assembling the poster. "Want to take a snack break?"

I bit my lip and eventually put the poster on the table along with all the other supplies. "Sure," I answered avoiding his hand when he tried to place it on my back. We walked into the kitchen and I sat down on a stool and placing my hands on the little table. There was a big table that was in the dining room but the kitchen was big enough that you could fit a small table in there. Probably where the kids would sit if they ever had a party and there wasn't enough room at the big table. Just then the phone rang up in his room and he excused himself and ran to retrieve it. While he was gone I walked back into the living room and observed all the family pictures sitting on the mantle. I picked up one that was of Edward when he was about 2 with spaghetti all over his face. I smiled and went to sit on the couch but when I turned my leg twisted. The picture flew out of my hand and I tumbled to the floor. Quickly I got up and moved over to collect all the pieces of glass and grab the picture. That's when I saw that there was actually another picture in the frame besides the one of Edward. Gently I placed the broken shards on the coffee table and picked up the hidden picture. I gasped and dropped the pictured back to the floor. It was my mom but she was laughing and had her arm wrapped romantically around Edward's father Carlisle and he was leaned over kissing her neck. That didn't make any sense; I thought my mom and dad hated the Cullens. Unless they used to be friends and something happened to break up the friendship. Except my dad wasn't in it and neither was Edward's mom and the way they were wrapped around each other the way lovers would be. None of this made sense. Had my mother cheated on my dad with Carlisle and that's why they hated each other and the same with Edward's mom and my mom? No, that couldn't be true. My parents loved each other. Suddenly I felt very sick and I didn't want to be in this house any more. I knew I shouldn't have come. This was all just some crazy mix up. Maybe I was hallucinating, maybe I when I fell I'd actually fell on my head and this was all just a trick of my imagination. As fast as I could I grabbed all the broken pieces and threw them in the trash in the kitchen. I picked up the picture of Edward with food on his face and just leaned it up against one of the other pictures in frames. Before I could better of it I grabbed the picture of my mom and Carlisle and shoved it in my pocket. As I was about to flee to my truck Edward came down the stairs.  
"Is everything ok, I thought I heard you fall?"

I bit the inside of my lip to keep back the tears that I knew wanted to fall. "Yeah I'm ok I just got a call from home, I need to come home now." I didn't even give him a chance to respond I just picked up the poster and supplies and headed straight for the door. I knew Edward was following me but I didn't care I just pretended I didn't even notice. I threw the stuff in the back without thinking then opened my door to get in.  
Edward looked thoroughly confused and I would have felt bad if I didn't already feel like throwing up. "Do you want to meet up tomorrow to finish this? We can meet at the library if you want."

I turned to him and just stared at him trying to think of a way to say no without sounding rude. "No that's ok I'll finish it by myself." Then I just hit reverse and got out of there faster than I would have normally gone. In my rearview mirror I could see Edward's perplexed expression but I just moved my eyes back to the road. At this point I couldn't fight it anymore and just let the tears flow. By the time I pulled into my driveway my whole face was soaked with my tears. I tore in the house and flew up the stairs. I fell on my bed and sobbed miserably until I was too exhausted to cry anymore and fell asleep. Of all the things I thought could be the reason behind our families disliking each other so much I never dreamed it could be something like this. How could I ever look at my mom the same again?


	5. Chapter 5

When I woke up my whole body ached. Out the window I could see the sky was not dark. I hoped it was late enough that my mom and dad were asleep; I really didn't want to face them after what I'd seen. Now I had 2 things I had to keep from them, the fact that I had to spend time with Edward and that I'd seen a picture of my mom and Carlisle together. Wait a second, maybe I was just overreacting and blowing this whole thing out of proportion. Yeah, that seemed like the most logical explanation. So I would just do what I do best, deny the whole thing ever happened. I took the picture out of my pocket, making sure it was upside down so I didn't accidentally look at it, and shoved it in a box and pushed it under my bed.

"Bella, phone call!!" Well so much for my parents being in bed. Who would call me on my house when they know I always carry my cell. I reached into my pocket to see if I'd missed a call. It wasn't there. Oh no. I must have left it at Edward's. It probably fell out of my pocket when I'd fallen. And saw that picture of my mom. No! There was no picture, I just fell and then picked up the glass and left. I opened my door a couple inches and looked both ways to make sure my parents weren't anywhere around. When I decided it was safe I flew down the stairs and grabbed picked up the receiver.

"Hello."

"Hey Bella, its Edward." Even on the phone his voice sounded perfect. Was he nuts, calling my house when there was a chance my parents might recognize him and then discover that I'd been over to his house? Ok stay focused Bella just see what he wants then get back up to your room without running into your parents.

"Oh hey"

"I just wanted to let you know that you dropped your cell phone. I put it in my room so it didn't get broken. Do you want to meet up tomorrow so you can get it?" Well I guess he would get to see me tomorrow after all. The more conspiracy theory oriented side of my considered that he might have set this up somehow but that didn't seem likely and I was all about the most sensible things these days.

"Yeah I guess I have no choice. You still want to meet at the library?"

"Sure is 1:00 ok with you?" I heard the smile in his voice and couldn't help but return it. When you actually gave Edward a chance he could be charming. It was difficult to imagine hating him. I didn't know how my parents did it all the time and make it took easy almost fun. For a split second I visualized the picture but just as fast erased it without a second thought.

"Ok. See you tomorrow."

"Goodnight." He hung up and I gently put the phone down.

"Bella." I gasped and spun around. My mom was looking at me confused and then a smile spread across her face. "Are you ok honey?"

"Yeah sorry I just thought you and dad would be sleeping."

"It's only 9:00. So who was on the phone?"

"Ed—." Oh god. What was I saying? "Edgar, he's just this boy in my class that I'm doing a school project with. Um would it be ok if I met him at the library tomorrow around 1:00 to finish working?"

"Sure sweetie you have a good time." Yeah right.

"I will." I quickly went back to my room before I she could ask me anything else about my imaginary classmate Edgar. I wasn't good at thinking on my feet especially if I was under pressure. It was way too early for me to sleep but I didn't want to go back out and risk my having to talk to my parents. Again my mind drifted to the picture. Why would my mom be spending time with someone she hates especially in such a position? I had no way of knowing when the picture was taken so it could have been 10 years or 2 days ago. Of course if I looked at it again I could tell by how young my mom looked but I was determined to forget the things very existence. About 30 minutes later I heard my mom going to bed followed by my dad shortly after that. I was still nowhere near ready for bed. I just laid there letting my mind wondering but making sure it didn't even get to a subject that might remind me of my mom or the Cullen's.

Knock! Knock! Knock!

I jumped and fell right off the bed. When I pushed the blanket off me cold fear gripped my heart. Somebody was at the window. It was Edward Cullen but he looked somehow weird like he was shaking. When I moved a little closer I could see he was doubled over laughing hysterically. Well wasn't that nice he nearly gave me a heart attack and then laughed about it. Angrily I yanked the window open.

"What are you doing here!?"

It took him a minute to compose himself. "Well I couldn't sleep and my parents called and said they were stuck out of town until tomorrow so I thought I would be a gentleman and bring your cell phone to you." Some gentleman.

"Well you better get in here before you fall and I get blamed for it." He easily jumped into my room without making a big boom when he landed on the floor. "Nice room."

"Thanks," I answered, still a little angry about him scaring me before. As I watched him inspect my room I thought about asking him about the picture. He might know something and it did sort of concern him, well at least it concerned his father. "Can I ask you about something?"

"You want to know why I showed up at your birthday party." I paused, I did want to know that but I decided to go with my original question. I would have to remember to ask him about being at my party later.

"No, I actually wanted to show you a picture." He seemed genuinely surprised by this and I felt a second of triumph. He always seemed so sure of himself and I was glad I'd caught him off guard.

"Uh yeah sure." I got down on all fours and pulled the box out and opened it.

"Here," I handed him the picture and waited for him to look it over.

"Where did you get this?" Oops, I almost forgot that I'd actually taken the picture from a frame in Edward's house.

"Well when I fell at you house a frame dropped and broke. Behind it was this picture that has my mom—"

"You mean you stole it?"

"No it's called borrowing; I was going to return it. Sometime."

He looked at me skeptically. "Uh huh."

"You know you're not as cute as you think you are." To my complete annoyance he seemed amused by my statement. "Please just look at the picture." His eyes remained on mine for a few more seconds then flipped down to the photo. His forehead creased and he brought the photo closer to his face.

"This doesn't make any sense."

"Tell me about it. How do you think I felt when I first saw it?"

"Hey, do your parents have boxes with old pictures of them anywhere?"

"Yeah they're up in the attic."

"Great, let's go."

He started to move to the door and I had to grab his arm. He fell back on top of me and we toppled to the floor. "Are you insane my parents are right next door?"

"They're sleeping. Come on it will be easy haven't you ever snuck out of your house after your parents went to bed?" I blushed. I never had and before now I didn't feel stupid for it. The way he said it though made me feel like I was a goody two shoes.

"Of course I have."

"Then let's go."

"Wait! Why are we going to the attic anyway?" He looked at me like I was missing something very obvious.

"To see if there are any more pictures like this."


	6. Chapter 6

"Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. We're been up here for hours and we haven't found anything." Edward rolled his eyes and I couldn't help but laugh.

"It's been 35 minutes." Oh. Somehow it seemed like a lot longer than that. We'd already gone through 3 boxes and couldn't find any pictures with his parents in them. I sighed and closed the latest box full of uninteresting pictures with boring people.

"Bella?"

I heard my dad's voice down the stairs but it was muffled by the door. Panic shot straight through me then I lunged for Edward. "Hide somewhere hurry!" he quickly moved to behind some boxes stacked up and I breathed a sigh of relief. Phew.

"Bella are you up here?" I heard my dad climbing the stairs. "Bells what are you doing up here?"

"I couldn't sleep so I decided to come look through some old family… stuff." I avoided saying pictures in case he knew something and moved the pictures to a different location.

"Well it's late can't you do this in the morning."

"Oh, Sure." I waited a few second for him to leave but he didn't move. He was obviously waiting for me to go with him. I racked my brain to come up with a way to make him leave without me so I didn't have to leave Edward up here. I don't know why I said what I did next, maybe it was sleep deprivation setting in.

"Have you ever met Edward Cullen?" I could have sworn I heard Edward gasp but I ignored him. Charlie's face changed from bored and tired to annoyed.

"You're not spending time with that Cullen boy are you? You know how I feel about them."

"But why?" He shook his head and turned to go back down the stairs.

"He's just not the kind of kid I want you with." Don't forget to turn off the light when you leave." Then he shut the door and went back to bed. Edward came out from behind the boxes but I couldn't look at him. I wish he hadn't heard my father talk badly about his family and him.

"Sorry" I mumbled absently moving boxes around so I wouldn't have to look into his eyes.

"Bella." His tone is what made me stop messing with the boxes and turn my eyes up to his. "Do you feel the same way as he does?"

"No, I don't even understand how this all started." He is gaze locked on me and I didn't dare turn away.

"I'm glad" that's all he said. The next thing I knew he was across the room kissing me. Instinctively my hands went around his neck and I kissed him back. All thoughts went away except for the feel of his lips on mine. It just seemed so perfect so right. Like a flash though I remembered that this was the one boy I wasn't supposed to be with. I broke the kiss unwillingly and put a few steps between us. Edward watched every move I made but instead of feeling nervous like I probably should have I just felt protected like he was keeping watch for me.

"I should probably get back to bed before my dad comes back and gets even more suspicious."

"Ok," he took my hand and pulled me down the stairs, checked to make sure my dad was back in his room then quickly guided me to my room. He sat down on the bed and I sat next to him never taking my hand from his. "Are you tired?" A yawn escaped me before I could deny it like I was planning to. "Guess so." He released my hand to my disappointment and moved to make room for me to lie down on the bed.

"You don't have to leave yet." He just smiled and took my hand again. I wanted to stay up and continue talking to him just to keep hearing his voice but my eyes kept drooping shut.

"Go to sleep Bella." Edward commanded me quietly and shifted down a little so he was partially laying down. Part of me knew I shouldn't let Edward stay like that because if Charlie came in and saw this he would kill the both of us. I drifted to sleep then but just before I did I thought I heard Edward start to hum.

When I woke up Edward was gone and I instantly felt empty. I went to wipe the sleep out of my eyes but instead of my skin on my face I felt paper. My eyes snapped open and I brought the piece of paper in my hand down so I could see what was on it.

_Bella, _

_See you at 1:00 at the library. Your phone is on the dresser. Sweet dreams. _

_-E_

I'd almost forgotten that I was meeting him to finish the project. That brightened my outlook on the day considerably.

"Morning Bella." My mom stood in the doorway.

"Hey mom. Good morning."

"I made waffles if you're hungry they're on the table."

Mmmm, I loved waffles. "Thanks mom I'll be right down." I changed clothes and went to brush my teeth. I sat down at the table with my parents and ate my two waffles and milk. My father was reading the paper but I could see my mom studying me. She was trying to be sneaky about it, pretending to look at something behind me or just glance from the side of her eye. I wondered if my dad had told her I was up in the attic last night and that I'd asked about Edward. It would've been so much easier if I could have just asked about the picture but I was scared my mom would get mad at me. When I was done I went upstairs to take a shower. After I was out and dressed I got out the poster and started placing some of the pictures on it. At 12:35 I got my stuff together and went downstairs. I figured it would be good to be a little early.

"I'm going to the library now. I'll see you guys later," I shouted to my parents and waited a second for a response.

"Ok have fun. Call us if anything goes wrong," my mom called back. Why would something go wrong working on a school project? Oh well I got to my truck and drove to the library. I still had a few minutes before Edward would get here so I just laid out the poster board and put all the pictures and printed out excerpts from the book on top on one of the tables.

"Pretty poster." I spun around and smiled at Edward.

"Thank you, I worked very hard on it." We both laughed and then sat down to get started. When I looked up, however, I noticed most of the people in the library were staring at us. I began to feel self-conscious but when they saw me look up they quickly started talking to each other or returned to whatever it is they were doing before.

"I'll be right back I'm going to just grab a book real fast." I walked down an aisle searching the author's names looking for the one I wanted. I couldn't help but over hear the people in the aisle next to mine whispering to each other.  
"You believe that, a Swan spending time with a Cullen?"

"Like mother like daughter I guess." The two men just laughed and then walked down further so I couldn't hear them anymore. Huh? What an odd thing to say. I didn't spend too much time thinking about it though, I just grabbed the book when I finally found it and walked back. Whatever the big secret about the feud with our two families was though, I was starting to get the feeling I was one of the few people who didn't know what happened.


	7. Chapter 7

For the rest of the afternoon I alternated between working on the project with Edward and making sure people weren't staring at us. I knew some people kept their eyes on teenagers to make sure they weren't getting into trouble but this was excessive. What had that guy said...like mother like daughter? I tried to make sense of that statement. I had a theory but I didn't want to admit what it was to myself. I thought of my mother as a role model I didn't want to consider the possibility that she had done something as awful as what I was thinking. Edward seemed to be oblivious to the attention we were getting. In fact when he wasn't paying attention to the project he would focus his eyes on me and remain that way for several seconds. However I tried to ignore all of these things, the first because what did I care what strangers though? Ignoring Edward was hard but was even harder than that was realizing I was starting to feel something for him. It was wrong and I knew I shouldn't but I just couldn't help myself. Just 2 days ago my only problem was that people had spent too much money on my birthday party.

"Do you have to be home soon?" My parents hadn't given me a curfew. I didn't actually go out that much so they were happy when I spent time out of the house with friends. Although if they knew that friend was Edward Cullen I had a feeling they would change their minds. Or maybe my dad would anyway. Maybe this whole feud was really between our dads.

"Nope, as long as I'm home before tomorrow." He playfully stuck his lower lip out. I went to smack him but he grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips. It felt like everyone one in the library took a collective deep breath including me. His eyes stayed with me the whole time and I had to look down before my face resembled a tomato. I felt his sweet breath on my face. Shakily I began gathering the scraps of paper and put the glue and other supplies back in my bag. I tried to stand to throw the trash away. He put his hand on my shoulder to stop me and that simple touch caused my heart to hammer in my chest. I put my head between my legs and took several deep breaths.

"Want to get some food before you go home?" I nodded, once again it was a stupid thing to do but I didn't want my time with Edward to be over yet, and stood up. I closed my eyes to collect myself. The last thing I needed was to fall on my face with the whole library staring at us. I was certain the second we were out the door the place would erupt in gossip. I stopped in my tracks right outside the door. What if someone told my parents me and Edward were here together? Forks wasn't exactly known for keeping secrets. I'd be lucky if they hadn't heard by the time I got home. I pulled my cell phone out and saw I had a voice mail.

"Hold on Edward, I'll be right there." He nodded and went to sit on a bench next to the library.

_Hey Bella just letting you know me and your father are going to be at our friend's for a while tonight. I left you money to order a pizza. I love you. _

I sighed in relief. At least we didn't have to go out somewhere else in public where more people could see us together and repeat the news to my parents. I motioned to Edward that I was done and he came over to my side.

"My parents are going to be at a friend's so we can eat pizza at my house ok?"

"Anything you want." Yeah right, what I wanted most was for my life to not be so complicated. I didn't want to have to hide who I was spending my time with from my parents. Mostly I just wanted to be able to admit I had feelings for Edward without feeling guilty about it.

"Do you mind if we just take my car, I'll drive you back later?" That way I got maximum time with him. He nodded smiling, he seemed just as happy with the idea.

"Hey did your father always live in Forks?" The question surprised me. I wondered why he would need to know that but I told him

"Yeah…" I said it in a way that would make it obvious I wanted to know why he asked. However all he said was,

"Oh so has mine." My eyes brows drew together in confusion. Why did he care if my father always lived in Forks? Most people in Forks had been here all their lives. This explained why most people knew the reason for our families not liking each other. Except me that is, and maybe Edward I couldn't decide if I thought he knew something or not. It seemed an odd question to ask out of the blue without some thought behind it. As Edward drove I pondered this. By the time we pulled into my driveway I was still thoroughly confused but I refocused on Edward which I was happy to do. He got out of the car and came around to open the door for me. We walked quickly to the house so the neighbors wouldn't see me walking into the house with him. The more I thought about it the more frustrated I got. Having to hide from the prying eyes of the town was ridiculous but when you're father is the chief of police he knows most people in town that could potentially rat me out to my dad.

"Where is the phone book?" I pointed to it and Edward found and called in the pizza order. For a couple minutes we sat there in awkward silence. Well it was awkward for me Edward seemed to be perfectly happy watching me doodle on a scrap piece of paper left on the table. I jumped when the doorbell rang. I handed Edward the money for the pizza and tried to catch my breath and slow my heart while he was out of the room. I didn't know why but Edward had the power to make my heart beat faster and make me feel dizzy and wonderful all at the same time.  
"Thanks," I said as he put the pizza box on the table. I had just grabbed my second slice of pizza when I heard the front door open. I froze, with the pizza in the air and my mouth hanging open. I turned horrified eyes on Edward whose expression was equally as distressed.

"Bella! We're home."


	8. Chapter 8

I threw the pizza slice in the box and shut it. I grabbed Edward's arm and put the box in his arms.

"Hey honey, I know we're early but..." my dad caught sight of Edward and his face turned livid.

"What is he doing here!!!?" I cringed back and bit my lip.

"He's the one that delivered the pizza." It was the only excuse I could think of that wouldn't involve explaining about the project and being at his house. I felt really bad for Edward, he shouldn't have to hear my dad badmouth him like he was a criminal. He didn't seem nervous or upset though, as he put the pizza down and turned to leave. I still had to figure out a way to get outside to drive him home. Before he was out of the room he looked in my eyes for a second. I knew he was trying to communicate something to me but I couldn't figure out what. When I heard the front door shut I turned to my parents.

"How was your night?" My dad still seemed somewhat mad but now that Edward was gone he seemed less tense. I wondered what he was doing since he had no way to get home.

"It was nice. Did you finish your project?" My mom asked this but she didn't seem nearly as mad. Actually she seemed kind of sad.

"Yeah it's all done" My eyes went to the table to find my cell phone. It was gone! That's what he was trying to tell me. He'd taken my cell to use as an excuse to go back out. "Oh I can't find my cell phone I think I left it at the library. Do you mind if I go back and try to find it?"

"Sure. Be careful." As I grabbed my keys and was almost at the door I saw my dad lift up the pizza box. He would see that nearly half of it was missing. I quickened my pace and got outside before he could question about the missing slices. Edward was already sitting in the car but he was on the driver's side. I was going to protest but when I thought about what he had to put up with I changed my mind and got in on the other side. It didn't seem fair, when I was at his house his parents never knew I was there; this was the second time Edward had to hear my dad criticize him.  
"I'm really sorry I thought they would be gone for hours." Although I really should have known better. Even though my dad was chief of police he wasn't exactly the most social able person.

"It's ok I have parents too." That shouldn't have hurt considering the way my parents felt but I didn't want to think about his parents not liking me. All I knew about his parents was that his dad worked at the hospital and was very successful. Of course I'd never actually seen him work because I wasn't allowed to go to his hospital (which was kind of scary for someone as accident prone as me.) I'd assumed his mom was a homemaker since I never heard about her having a job. We pulled into the library parking lot right next to his car. For several seconds we just sat there. I didn't know about him but I was glad because I was dreading have to watch him drive away.

"I better get going." He opened his door and went over to his car. I got out too but instead of going to the seat his was just sitting in, I walked to his with him. He spun around quickly and grabbed my face between his hands.  
"Don't listen when they tell you that you shouldn't be with." Before I could agree his lips crashed down on mine and he pushed my back against the door of his car. My arms wrapped around him and pulled him closer. I put a few inches between us to answer.

"I won't," he smiled and kissed me once more but pulled away quickly this time. "Goodnight Bella." He leaned down to pick a flower that was growing at the front of his car. My breathing was still ragged as I watched him pull out. Slowly I pulled myself together and started my car. My parents were oddly absent from the first floor when I got home so I grabbed a quick slice of pizza and went to my room. I nearly shrieked when I saw Edward sitting on my bed.

"What are you doing here?" I whispered frantically.

"Visiting you." I noticed there was something in his hands. A box. "I remembered I forgot to give you your birthday present." Oh great as if I didn't get enough of them. My eyes narrowed on the box and I took a step towards him.

"What is it?" He placed the box in my hands. I studied it for a second then ripped off the wrapping paper. It was a beautiful journal and pencils with my name on them.

"I heard somewhere that you like to write, I thought you might need something to write in. I didn't take my eyes off it. "I'm sorry it's late but I couldn't exactly give it to you at your party." I blushed at the mention of my birthday celebration.

"Thank you so much." He leaned over to kiss my forehead. Gently I laid it on the dresser and put the pencils on top of it. "I'll be right back." I quickly went to the bathroom and brushed my teeth. As I passed the mirror I made sure my hair looked ok and adjusted my top. I opened the door and looked right into the face of my mother.

"Is everything ok Bella?" For a second I thought she knew Edward was in my room but when she didn't say anything else I figured she was just genuinely concerned for me.

"Yeah I'm fine mom."

"Ok. Just know that you can talk to me about anything." She definitely knew or at least suspected something but I decided to play dumb.

"I know." Her expression was slightly disappointed as I passed her to get to my room. I would have told her but I wanted to find out about that picture before I mentioned Edward to her. Something told me my dad would be a little harder to convince though. When I got back Edward was still sitting on my bed looking just as amazing as ever. I paused for only a moment but then I went to the bed and lay down beside him. He smiled at me and I relaxed my head on his chest. My eyes snapped open as I heard a creak outside in the hall. I slipped out from under the covers to lock the door.

"You don't have to do that, I have get home anyway." It hurt to hear but I didn't show it on my face. I nodded as he came over to hug me. "Enjoy the journal."

"I will," I promised. He opened my window and then was gone. Distantly I heard an engine start and then drive away. I closed the window then lay in my bed. My pillow, I realized, smelled just like Edward. I turned my face into it and smiled contently. The last thing I thought before I slipped into unconsciousness was _I'm in love with Edward Cullen_.


	9. Chapter 9

"Bella! Bella!" My eyes opened half way and I inwardly groaned when I saw Alice. She didn't look happy and that was a rare thing for her. I sat up and wiped the sleep from my eyes.

"What's the matter?" She hesitated as if not sure how to start. This couldn't be good.

"Have you been spending a lot of time with Edward Cullen?" I stopped breathing. If Alice knew than that meant lots of people already knew which could include my parents.

"Maybe a little." It annoyed me that I felt guilty about it. There was nothing wrong with him and I shouldn't have to be afraid because people saw us together. "So what?"

"I'm not sure that's such a good idea." Please not Alice too. I could deal with my parents not approving of Edward once I figured out why but not my best friend.

"He's really nice. I don't understand why my parents hate him so much." Her jaw tightened and she looked at the ground. She knew. She knew the secret my parents were trying to keep about why they hated the Cullen's. I grabbed her shoulders. "Tell me." Her face became desperately sad and hopeless. "Alice tell me!"

"It's because your mom had an affair with his father." My blood ran ice cold. That couldn't be true. I would have found out about this sooner. Tears appeared in my eyes and instantly spilled down my cheeks. I'd been thinking that very thing myself but it was like a knife to the heart when she actually said the words out loud.

"How did you find this out?" I whispered through my tears.

"I've always known I just didn't want to hurt you." Betrayal. More tears came. I was the last person to know my mom cheated on my dad. Thinking it brought a fresh wave of pain. I wondered if Edward knew and was just trying to protect me like Alice was. That was why everyone stared at us when we were at the library; the daughter of the woman who had an affair with Carlisle was now with his son. What had the guy in the aisle next to me say? _Like mother like daughter. _Oh. It was all so perfectly clear and yet I never saw it.

Alice sank down to the floor with me. I hadn't even noticed I'd gone down. My cheek was pressed against the carpet and I felt Alice rubbing my back.

"C-Can I just be alone." But I didn't really want to be alone. I wanted to be with Edward. That probably wouldn't be a good idea though. The hand on my back disappeared and then I heard my door close. Fresh tears rolled down my cheeks and for several minutes I laid on the floor crying my heart out. Eventually I sat up and looked towards the window. The longing for Edward came back again. I flipped open my cell and on the front was a message. _Check your contacts_. He'd added his number to my phone. I immediately called him and felt relief the second it started ringing.

"Good morning." I smiled.

"I need to talk to you."

"Ok. Where do you want to meet?" His voice was worried which made me feel better. He cared about me.

"Library parking lot in fifteen minutes."

"OK." I hung up and quickly changed my clothes. When I went downstairs I saw Alice sitting on the couch with my mom. My father was at work most likely. Alice looked up concerned and came over to me.

Where are you going?" I eyed my mother who seemed to be busy reading a book. I guided Alice out the door anyway in case my mom was pretending so she could hear what I was saying. She used to do that when I was little and even though I'm 17 she still thought it worked.

"I'm going to talk to Edward." I could see she was about to protest and I shook my head.  
"I have to do this. Please." She sighed and nodded. "Thank you. I promise everything will be fine." I didn't actually believe that. I felt the farthest thing from fine but I had to make her feel better about me seeing Edward. I needed at least one person to be on my side. I hugged her and hurried to the car. Alice would cover for me with my mom. When I pulled into the parking lot I saw Edward leaning against the side of his car looking really worried. My heart constricted just looking at him. I flattered myself to think that he actually cared about me the way I did him though. Edward was right by me as soon as I opened my door.

"What's the matter?" I took a breath suddenly not so sure about what I was doing. What if he didn't know? Did I really want to tell him that our parents had had an affair? I had to stall for time so I could think.

"I just wanted to tell you I wrote a story in that journal you got me. I guess I did need something nice to write in." I could tell by his expression he didn't buy it. Of course he didn't just let it go though, why pass up a chance to make fun of me?

"Ok let's see it." I swallowed. Uh oh. Real smart Bella. He flashed me a smile and I lost my train of thought."

"Huh?" This time he laughed.

"Why are you really here Bella?" I sighed and turned away from him. I didn't want him to see the tears that were already filling my eyes.

"Do you know…why…our parents…?"

"Hate each other?" he supplied. I laughed nervously.

"Yeah."

"Sort of." I turned to him. "All I know is that our dad's used to be best friends." My eyes widened. I didn't know that. That would explain why my father was the angrier of my parents. His best friend had an affair with his wife or maybe girlfriend I didn't know when this actually occurred. "Do you know why?" Looking into his eyes was painful. I just couldn't tell him the truth. I was starting to see what Alice meant when she said she didn't want to hurt me. The last thing I wanted to do was bring Edward pain.

"No." He seemed mildly disappointed.

"Oh, I was hoping you could tell me why it never made much sense to me." I bit my lip. I hated lying to him but what if he got mad at me for what my mother did? "Do you still have that picture maybe I can just ask my dad…"

"No, I lost it. Sorry."

"Oh"

"Bella!" I whipped around to the parking lot entrance. Alice was idling there with her window down. "You better get home you're dad is pretty mad at you." I sighed and nodded. I guess he found out that I was with Edward yesterday but I'd been expecting this so I wasn't surprised.

"I better go." He nodded.

"Call me when you're done." I agreed and held my breath and he leaned over to kiss my cheek. I turned to get in my car when Alice hissed my name. I looked up startled and came walked up to her window

"What?"

"Bella I think you're not considering something." She'd lost me. I hated when she spoke cryptically. "Your mom and his dad had an affair…" She trailed off like I was just suppose to know the rest. I winced at the reminder though and answered through clenched teeth.

"I know Alice what am I missing?"

"Bella, he could be your brother."


	10. Chapter 10

I stared blankly at her for several seconds. Brother? No! I'd never heard a more hateful word. This wasn't fair. I loved him he couldn't be my brother!

"Bella. Bell!" Alice finally broke through the haze of my thoughts.

"What?"

"You have to get home." She was right but I didn't want to be home. I didn't want to be told that I was actually related to the boy I was in love with. Yuck!

"He looks nothing like me." I could hear the desperation in my voice. I turned to look at Edward who was staring at us curiously. I attempted a smile and waved. He returned the smile still eyeing us in confusion. I desperately wanted to tell him everything but I could barely tell myself. As I pulled up to the house I saw my dad's cruiser in the driveway and the living room shades were drawn. Great. This was going to be like a police interrogation. I rolled the windows up before getting out because the odds were likely it would rain. As soon as I walked into the house my dad called me.

"Bella, sit." I sat on the couch across from my mother. My father paced the floor in front of me clearly angry. Finally he turned to me.

"Where you yesterday?"

"The library."

"With…?"

"My English partner." It wasn't a smart thing to do I was just trying to prolong the inevitable. I could see my mother trying not to laugh.

"Isabella!"

"Ok, Edward Cullen"

"Bella I told you, you weren't suppose to see him!"

"But I l…" I stopped. Telling my father I was in love with Edward Cullen was really not something I should do. "Don't understand" I added quickly.

He didn't answer right away. Please don't say he's your brother please don't say he's your brother, I chanted to myself.

"His family isn't trustworthy and I don't want him to hurt you." Through this whole thing my mother hadn't said anything. I didn't take notice of that at that moment though all I paid attention to was that he never said Edward was related to me in any way. On the inside I was dancing but my facial expression remained guilty. "So I'm going to have your class exchanged." My head snapped up and my mental dancing came to an abrupt halt. School was the only place I could be with Edward without having to make sure people weren't watching us. Hiding the instant pain his words caused from my face was difficult.

"But it's already half way through the year."

"You can move to advanced English." He was right. I never wanted to because I already had 2 other advanced classes. My excuses were running out along with my self-control. I bit the inside of my lip to keep from crying.

"I'd really rather not change classes in the middle of the year." He sighed and sat down next to my mother. I got to my feet and walked up the stairs. The tears came then. This was the 3rd time recently that I had cried. My life was spinning out of control. In my room I grabbed the journal Edward had given me. On the inside cover I noticed there was something written into it, engraved.

_Isabella, don't ever change. _

That just made me feel worse. Every day I became even more confused. I jumped when I heard a knock at the door.

I closed the journal quickly and pushed it under the bed "Come in." My mother came in and sat on the bed.

"Bella, listen I know you have been spending a lot of time with Edward and you like him. My breathing began to pick up. My mother was perceptive but I was hoping she hadn't picked up on how strongly I was feeling for Edward. "I know you don't want to but maybe you should just stay away from him for a while." So much for my mom being on my side. I nodded numbly at her. She looked like there was more she wanted to say but instead she just got up and walked out. After I heard her go down the steps I thought of something. Not once did my parents say whether he was or wasn't my brother. Sure I could just ask them but I knew I was too much of a coward to do that. Edward had asked me to call him as soon as my parents were done lecturing me but I couldn't. My thoughts were so scattered I wasn't sure if I could even form a coherent sentence right now. My eyes caught on my book shelf and suddenly escaping from reality seemed like a good idea. I grabbed a book and laid down on my bed. However I only got through a few pages, at least that I remember, before my eyes drooped shut and consciousness slipped away.

My ringing phone jolted me out of my sleep. It was Edward which didn't surprise me but the time did-3:00. Now I would be up late tonight. My waking and sleeping hours were really getting switched lately.

"Hey." My voice sounded all rough from sleep so I cleared it embarrassed at how I sounded.

"Hi, Bella. How are you is everything alright?" My heart squeezed at how worried he sounded. It just wouldn't be fair that he was my brother. I knew I had bad luck but could fate really be that cruel?

"I'm fine I just fell asleep."

"Oh. Did everything go ok with your parents?"

No. "Yeah well it was…" My throat was constricting just thinking of telling him I was switching classes. "My dad wants me to go to an advanced English class." I hoped he would believe this and not that it was actually his fault. He shouldn't feel like he was a burden when he was what made me most happy lately.

"Switching? But it's January." I know, tell me about it.

I sighed softly.  
"Yeah, but my father says I should be in that class." It was a poor cover-up but I was still too tired to come up with anything better. He knew how I felt. I hoped. I couldn't help it if my parents didn't feel the same way.

"Too bad your dad didn't decide this before we did all that work on the project." I knew he was trying to make a joke but I could hear the sadness hidden in his voice. It reflected the sadness in my heart. I laughed half-heartedly anyway. "Well I just wanted to make sure everything was ok."

"Yeah everything is fine." Except I'm being kept from the boy I love.

"Ok. Well I'll see you later hopefully." Pause. "I'll miss you." I had been holding my breath but when he said this, my breath burst from me in a short gasp.

"I'll miss you too. Goodbye." Reluctantly I hung up and put my cell phone next to the book on the bed. Even though I knew he was still there right across town, just a phone call away, I felt the loss of him deep in my soul.


	11. Chapter 11

The next morning my dad was waiting for me in his cruiser to drive me to school. As if that wasn't bad enough he also had to walk in with me to get my schedule changed. He went up to the desk in the office to talk to the secretary while I sat on one of the chairs right next to the door. I wasn't really paying much attention to their conversation; I was pretty much lost in my own moping.

"Ok Bella you're schedules changed so now your English and science are switched." Great English first. "But it doesn't take effect until tomorrow." My outlook brightened marginally. At least today I would still get to see Edward. Charlie walked out while I gathered my things and headed to science. To make it worse, I was also out of my class with Angela. There had to be something I could do to end this feud with the Cullens. Angela was already sitting in her seat and I sank down beside her.

"I'm switching classes." I told her sadly.

"What?"

"My dad is making me change my first and second period class."

"Because of Edward?" Was I that obvious? Or was it just that widely know about how our parents didn't like each other? Although if what Alice said was correct our parents used to be friends. I could understand why my dad would be upset but why not at my mom why just at Carlisle?

"Yeah." I answered looking at my desk. It bothered me that the whole town seemed to know my family's business. I'd gotten mostly used to it except this time it was something I didn't know and they had. Our teacher was back today but I didn't really notice the lesson. When the bell finally rang I nearly jumped out of my seat. I was anxious to see Edward. I wanted every second I could get with him today because I didn't know when I could see him again. I sat in my usual seat but this time I didn't put my books on the empty desk next to me. My heart rate picked up as soon as I saw him walk through the doorway. He smiled and headed straight for me.

"Hey."

"Hey." I tried to not sound as upset as I was but apparently I didn't do a good job.

"What's the matter?" Figures he could read me like a book. To my complete embarrassment tears filled my eyes. I tried to wipe them away but some escaped and slid down my cheeks.

"My father is making me change my first to classes." His expression grew sad but not surprised like I would have expected.

"So you won't be in the same class as me." Of course he knew why my parents didn't exactly keep their feelings hidden, especially from Edward. I squeezed my eyes shut as I answered

"Yes." Surprising me again Edward put his arms around me.

"That's ok. I have an idea." I was really curious about this idea he had but I didn't want to move out of his embrace. He smelled so wonderful and I fit so perfectly against him. There was no way I was going to disturb this moment to ask about the sore subject of my parents.

"Projects are due today!" I pulled out from Edward's arms reluctantly to grab the poster that was neatly rolled up in my bag. I took it out and gave it to Edward who walked in up to the teacher. While the other kids went up to hand theirs in or come up with excuses why it was not done today I figured was a good opportunity to ask about this plan he had. As he told me I found myself getting more depressed. There was no way this was going to work.

"It has to they have no choice but to work it out."

"Or kill each other." I added skeptically. He smiled and rolled his eyes. All the projects were turned in then and the teacher started the next assignment. Periodically throughout the hour of class Edward would look over at me and smile or wink. Every time he did this my breathing would quicken. I nearly felt my heart break when the bell finally rang ending class. I gathered my things as slow as I could without being late for my next class and walked to the door with Edward.

"Don't worry this will work."

"I hope." He leaned over and kissed me gently on the lips. Then he was gone and again I felt the pain of separation. I thought again about his plan so that our parents were ok with us seeing each other. Seemed a farfetched idea but at this point I was willing to try anything. The rest of the day was uneventful which was how I mostly liked it. When I got home I knew for sure I had to have an answer. I ran upstairs glad once again that I always got home before my parents. In their closet I quickly located the small box and dragged it out to the middle of the floor. I ripped in my haste and in the back of my mind made a note to repair it before my parents got here. I pulled out my birth certificate but before I looked I closed my eyes in anticipation. This was going to either take a huge weight off my shoulders or shatter my heart. There written right above father's name was Charles Swan. My breath whooshed out on a single sigh. Edward was not my brother.

* * *

**I'm sorry it's so short and it took a few days but I've been pretty busy lately. I will try to get the next chapter up sooner but I can't promise anything. Most likely by Friday. Enjoy!! Review please =]**


	12. Chapter 12

For several minutes I studied the piece of paper. It cleared Carlisle as being my father but not my mom as also being Edward's mom. The door opening downstairs alerted me to how long I had been in my parent's room reading my birth certificate. I was trying to avoid it but I now was going to have to ask Edward to let me see, or at least tell me, what it said on his birth certificate.

"Bella!" Quickly I put back everything and closed my parent's door. "Oh hey Bella."

"Hi mom. Uh do you want to go out to eat tomorrow night?" Please say yes.

"Sure, where do you want to go?"

"The diner?"

"Ok I'll talk to your father." I nodded and walked into my room to call Edward. The sooner I found out for sure whether we were related or not the better. I was shaking as I went to his name and hit send. It was ridiculous to be this upset but Edward really meant a lot to me and the idea that he was actually my half brother and therefore truly forbidden was too painful to think about.

"Hi Bella." Instantly I felt better. Still I didn't know what about him made me feel so good but just his voice made even the lousiest day seem wonderful.

"Hey." I was proud that my voice didn't shake once, I actually sounded normal.

"How are you doing?" Perfect now.

"Good. I know this sounds weird but do you know where your birth certificate is?"

He laughed "Yeah I have it somewhere in my closet." I took one deep breath to relax myself. It failed.

"What does it say?" I knew this probably wouldn't work the without having to tell him why I wanted to know.

"Just my parents, Carlisle and Esme and the date…"

"It says Carlisle and Esme?" I squeezed my eyes shut

"Of course."

Before I could stop it or even knew what was happening tears poured down my face. I took a breath but this time the breath was not smooth.

"What's the matter?" It was several seconds before I could even talk.

"Nothing, I'm fine now." I knew he wouldn't believe me but that was always my response to that question.

"Bella, I'm coming over." It was a bad idea and I should have said no but in that moment all I wanted to do was have him in my arms.

"Ok." When we hung up and rolled onto my bed and let the tears fall. I wasn't even sure why I was acting like this. This didn't 100% make it fact what our certificates said but for right now I put all my faith that it was true. I was also nervous, I was going to have to tell Edward that my mom and his dad had an affair and I didn't know how he would take it. It wasn't exactly the easiest thing to say to someone. It seemed unfair that we had to find out like this. Our parents should have shared this with us a long time ago. A few minutes later I heard a tap on my window. I jumped up and tripped over one of my shoes in my haste to let Edward in. Embarrassed I quickly righted myself and pushed up the window. My arms were around him before I could think pulling him into the room.

"What's wrong?" I was able to hold the tears back this time and motioned for him to sit on the bed.

"I have something to tell you." He raised his eyebrows curiously and looked at me. "It's about your dad and my mom." A smile spread across his face. I didn't even get a chance to question that before he started laughing. Laughing? This didn't seem like something that was in the slightest bit funny. My temper got the better of me. "What's so funny?"

Instantly he stopped laughing but the smallest hint of a smile was still there. "I'm very sorry it isn't funny at all but I already know about them." He knew? So I really was the only person to not find out until a few days ago. Looking back now I guess the clues were there I just never put them together. This knowledge didn't help calm my anger though.

"You knew!? I didn't know until the other day when I was at your house! Why didn't you tell me?" I knew I was raising my voice and any minute now my parents were going to be up here checking what the problem was.

All humor was gone from his place all that remained was sympathy and sadness. "I'm sorry I only found out two years ago. At first I was angry but I've learned to accept it now." For a second I just took this in. My cheeks began to brighten with embarrassment. Then I suddenly thought of something.

"Why did you come to my birthday party?"

He smiled "I was waiting for you to ask me that. It's simple Bella I've loved you for years and it seemed like the perfect chance to tell you once and for all how I felt." What? That didn't make any sense.

"And I ruined it by kicking you out." I looked down at the floor. His smile grew.

"Yeah that wasn't how I planned it but I did get your attention."

"What about the project?"

"That was trickier, I had to switch our names on his sheet so that we were partners." I smiled at first and then I was laughing, big side splitting laughter. Edward joined in and for the longest time we sat together laughing hysterically at our situation. If we thought logically about it we still weren't allowed to see each other and our parents still hated each other but there was nothing logical about the way we felt. When my stomach began to hurt from all this laughing I sat up and looked at Edward.

"What about our parents though, they still won't let us be together?" He took my hand and kissed it.

"Hopefully by tomorrow that will all be ancient history."


	13. Chapter 13

Edward sat with me for a few more minutes but once my parents called me for dinner we figured he better go. Halfway out the window he turned around to kiss me and then like a flash disappeared down to the ground below. I sighed and left to go downstairs. I could smell the chicken from the bottom of the stairs and when I got to the dining room I saw the table was already set.

"I would have put out the dishes."

"It's ok honey I got it." My mom smiled at me and sat down across from my dad. I sat and took some chicken and corn. This is how it usually was, we just ate, there wasn't much talking but it wasn't awkward just peaceful. Today, however, it seemed uncomfortable and I fidgeted in my seat. "Did you ask your father about tomorrow?" Instantly I panicked but kept my face composed.

"Tomorrow?"

"About dinner." Oh, right. Calm down Bella.

"Oh, no," I turned to Charlie, "I was thinking maybe tomorrow we could go out to dinner, you know instead of having to cook here." I hoped I sounded not that interested but inside I was dying from anxiety.

"Sure, that sounds like fun."

"Oh good." My panicked faded, not completely, but it ebbed. The rest of the meal was quiet occasionally interrupted if my mom asked me to pass the salt or my father asked how my day was. Finally I finished and brought my dishes to the sink. I waited for my parents to be done and cleared the table. We had no dishwasher so I cleaned to dishes by hand then dried them and put them away. Already I missed Edward and suddenly all I wanted to do was curl up on my bed and talk to him all night. While I was walking to the stairs I saw my mom and dad getting their coats on and ready to go.

"Where are you going?"

"We're going out to buy something for a birthday party tomorrow do you want to come?" I nodded and bounced up the stairs to my room. Before the door was even closed behind me, my cell was out and I was dialing Edward's number. I didn't even have to look it up anymore, I knew it by heart.

"Good evening Bella." I laughed at his greeting.

"Hey, did you ask your parents?"

"Yep, all set." I was trying not to let this get me too excited. The odds of this actually working were slim but if it happened to actually solve everything, I could be open about my feelings for Edward to my parents. As well as myself. I still couldn't bring myself to say that I loved him. On some level I accepted it but it just seemed not right with our parents being enemies and until recently, thinking we might actually be related.

"Ok, I'll meet you at the library parking lot at 6:00." That seemed like an appropriate place. It was the first place that we realized that we had feelings for each other. Well the first time I did, apparently Edward had feelings for me for longer than I wanted to think about.

"Yeah and that will give us about 10 minutes before world war 3 breaks out." I winced. I had been trying to deny the effects of what we were trying to do but it was about time I admitted it to myself.

I sighed. "I know."

"It won't be so bad; the worst part will be over quickly." I wasn't sure about that, once my dad got angry it took a while to calm him down. Facing his enemy might require hours for him to recover from that. I comforted myself with the knowledge that they used to be best friends. Aside from it helping me and Edward with our relationship, this would help my dad get his old friend back. I felt bad that their longtime friendship was ruined because of one mistake my mom made. Again, I considered just skipping all this drama and just asking my mom about what happened. However once again I dismissed it because just the thought of bringing up a subject like that with my mom turned my stomach.

"I hope this works."

"It will, trust me." I did. Even if his plan fell through, I knew that with everything in me I trusted Edward. We talked for a few minutes but eventually we ran out of things to say so we just sat on the phone neither one of us wanting to end the connection. I could have spent all night listening to Edward breathe but he interrupted my listening after only a minute or two.

"I guess we better get to sleep, we should save our energy for tomorrow." He ruined the mood but I couldn't help but smile. I was completely helpless to Edward's charm.

"I guess." I didn't even try to hide the sadness in my voice. He laughed at me like always. I seemed to amuse him more than I tried to.

"Goodnight angel." All better.

"Goodnight." Sadly I hung up the phone and lay back on my bed. Shortly after I heard the front door open and my parent's voices fill the house. They had no idea what Edward and I were planning for them tomorrow. It seemed cruel but what they did to us was just as mean, making me feel guilty for being with someone I like just because they had some silly feud with his parents. This seemed the only logical outcome for what they themselves started.


	14. Chapter 14

The next morning I was sick with worry. I knew that in the long run this would help me be with Edward but there was always the chance that it would just make things that much worse. When I walked down for breakfast my mom greeted me kindly but thankfully my dad was already headed to work. I'm not sure I could look both of them in the eyes and not break down and confess everything we had planned.

"Bella I want to tell you something." My mom's voice was timid and that was not like her. Instantly I went on alert.

"Ok what is it?" She took a deep breath as if to steady herself. She was completely off and that just wasn't my mom. I knew this was going to be about Edward's dad and her but I didn't know if I was ready to hear it. Of course this would confirm for sure that I could be with him without it being legally (not to mention morally) right. The tears came next and I couldn't keep myself from going to her even as the first one slid from her eye. I wrapped my arms around her.

"He was your father's best friend." I nodded still holding onto her trying to keep both her and me together. She pulled back to look at my face "thank you I'm ok now." I wasn't so sure but shakily sat back down in my seat across from her. "After me and Charlie had gone out for a while he invited me over to his house for a get together with some friends. Carlisle was there..." she paused obviously trying to pull herself together again. I felt a stab of pity. This must have been incredibly difficult for her to admit to her daughter. After only a minute she smiled back at me and continued. "Charlie ran out of drinks so he went to the store down the street to get some. He was only gone maybe ten minutes but I felt a deep connection with Carlisle. Over the next couple of weeks I secretly saw him when I wasn't with Charlie but once..." again she had to stop to collect herself. I was so wrapped in her words I hadn't even realized that my face had twisted into an appalled expression. Quickly I relaxed it into a more neutral look before she could see and get her feelings hurt. I didn't want to rush her but I was so anxious to hear the rest of what happened. I was also horrified by the idea.

"It's ok mom you don't have to tell me the rest." I said this out loud but internally I was screaming at myself for destroying my last chance to hear the truth of her affair. Uck, even thinking the word was unpleasant.

"No, I want you to hear from me what happened." Just like when she started she took another deep breath. "We weren't careful; we were sitting together at the park having a picnic when Charlie saw us together." I winced picturing how my dad would have taken it. Kind of like the way my dad will probably react when he sees the Cullens today, I thought to myself. She closed her eyes no doubt lost in the past. "Your father was so angry, he started yelling at Carlisle and saying he betrayed him. I tried to calm him down but he wasn't exactly thrilled with me either." She stopped like she was done but I still had questions that she hadn't answered.

"But why are _you_ mad at Carlisle?"

"Well he blamed the whole thing on me. Said I was the one who came on to him and that I instigated the whole thing. We were young that's how young kids act." I processed this for a second. Carlisle always seemed like such a great guy I couldn't imagine him blaming it all on my mom. Although he was about to lose his best friend, maybe that was the only way he could see that might not make him lose Charlie. Didn't work. I still had the big question left but I wasn't ready to ask it yet. After all my mom told me I wasn't sure how much more my heart could take. To avoid my big question I just asked something smaller I was curious about.

"If Charlie was so mad at you, why did he stay with you and marry you?" I hadn't meant for it to come out quite like that but she didn't seem that bothered by it.

"He did love me and I loved him, with all my heart. We fought for a while about it but I just proved to him and myself that he was the only one I wanted to be with and it's still true today." I would have found this comment sweet normally but I was so shocked by everything that came before it that it barely registered in my brain. Unfortunately I had run out of questions except for the one I had been most wondering about from the beginning.

"What about Edward…he's not…" I trailed off not wanted to actually put my greatest fear into words.

"Related to you?" A smile spread across her face removing all the sorrow that had just been all over it. "Of course not, he is Esme and Carlisle's" My heart swelled and tears of pure joy fell from my eyes. "The affair was at least two years before you were born." More tears replaced the ones I had wiped away and my mom scooped me into her arms.

"I have to go soon or I'm going to be late for school."

"Ok" My mom released me placing one final kiss on my cheek. Then throwing me one last smiling glance, she walked up the stairs. I got my bag off the kitchen table and walked out to my truck. Although my mom's story made me feel bad and still a little guilty about what I was going to do, it strengthened my resolve that this is what we all needed.


	15. Chapter 15

It was a relief to be able to get out of the house. I enjoyed talking to my mom and I was really glad that she finally told me the truth but I just needed to take a breath. Especially when I knew what was going to happen tonight. Although with what my mom just said it didn't sound like she held much of a grudge against Carlisle at least she sounded like she didn't. When I pulled into the parking lot I couldn't help but smile, because Edward was leaning against his car waiting for me. As soon as I parked he was at my door opening it for me.

"Hey" I had to smile when I heard his voice. It always amazed me that just one word from him and any stress my mom's talk today might have caused, just vanished. Of course they would come raging back when I thought about the showdown tonight between our parents.

"Hey." I couldn't hold back the sigh that escaped my lips when I said his name. He smiled in response and draped his arm around my shoulders. Again a wash of pure happiness filled my very soul as I leaned into him.

"Are you ok about tonight?" No small talk or "good morning" or even "how are you doing?" he just went right to the pressing subject. This actually was probably for the best. If I talked about it with Edward I wouldn't have to stress about it all day. Well I still would, that was just me but it would be less. We started walking towards the school and I tried to block out everything except our footsteps and Edward's breathing close to my ear. It really was a peaceful sound.

"Yeah I'm just a little worried about how my father will take it." That was an understatement. I'd be lucky if he didn't have to get arrested by one of his own colleagues which of course would humiliate him. Then the whole town would be talking about how the chief of police himself had to be arrested. Damn Forks.

"It will be ok. At first they may fight," _will _fight I corrected in my head, "but after a few minutes they will talk it out and stop this stupid fight that has lasted a lot longer than it should have." I agreed with him but I just wasn't as positive a person as him. I tended to see just the dark cloud and not the silver lining.

We got to my first period class much sooner than I would have liked and Edward hugged me tightly, whispered once again that things would be fine, and walked in the other direction towards his first period. Automatically my shoulders hunched without Edward's reassurance and I opened the door and sat down. This was the class that I usually had with Edward so of course I was sad the whole time. I got done my work and went through the day in a fog. Although at lunch I got to sit with Angela and we talked about school stuff and things in her life which helped take my mind off my worries temporarily. The rest of the time I flip flopped between being worried about how our parents were going to react and trying hard, and failing, to not think about Edward. Lately he seemed to be all that my mind focused on. When the day was finally over I was surprised to see it was Alice waiting outside my last class and not Edward.

"So are you getting your parents to bury the hatchet?" Of course she knew, Alice always seemed to just know everything, it was kind of scary sometimes.

"Yeah, how did you know that?" She smiled mischievously.

"You have been spending an awful lot of time with Edward despite your parents making it clear they hated that idea so I just figured either you have a death wish or you are going to try to make it ok for you and Edward to see each other." She made things always sound so clear. "So I guess this means you and him aren't related?"

"No, thank god." She nodded.

"I didn't think so." I would have asked her about that but I saw Edward waiting by his car for me. Alice obviously saw him too because she leaned over to give me a hug and said, "Good luck let me know how everything goes."

"I will." She gave me a reassuring smile before turning and getting into her own car. I tried to stall for time by watching as she drove to the end of the parking lot and turned onto the highway. When she was out of sight and most of the lot was empty, I walked over to Edward.

"Hey," I didn't know how he always sounded so cheerful even though things could completely take a turn for the worst. I guess again, it all had to do with his outlook on the situation. We seemed to balance each other out.

"Hi." He laughed at my gloomy tone.

"When did you tell your parents to meet you at the restaurant?"

"Five. What about you?"

"Same time." It was three now so we still had two hours of peace. We had agreed that at the time our parents were getting to the restaurant we would meet at the library and drive over to keep an eye of the situation. This was Edward's idea because if it was up to me I would stay as far away from that restaurant parking lot as I could. It probably was for the best so that on the off chance things got out of hand we could run in and try to break it up. We talked for another minute then we quickly kissed and I got in my car. I didn't actually pull in until I saw that my mom's car wasn't in the driveway. She usually did errands and shopping during the day so I wasn't surprised by her absence. It was still only 3:30 so I went to the living room and tried to watch TV. After only a few minutes I left though because I couldn't seem to concentrate on any of the shows. I got myself a bowl of cereal in the kitchen since I didn't eat much at lunch. When I was done I washed my dish and put it away. It was still only 4:40 but I was going crazy in the house so I got in my car and drove to the library early. However, to my surprise Edward was already there sitting on the hood of his car.

"Hey what are you doing here so early?"

"I figured you would since you seemed so nervous about it at school." We hadn't even known each other all that long but already he seemed to be able to predict my actions. But he had known me, at least from afar. It was weird to think that all that time I had pretty much ignored Edward Cullen he had been falling in love with me.

"That was smart of you. I was going insane in that house." He laughed and pulled me against his body. I nestled my head against his chest, really glad that I had chosen to come early. Nothing was worth missing this time with Edward. The moment was over before I really even got a chance to enjoy it.

"We better get going." I sighed. I locked my doors and got in the passenger side of Edward's car. I tried to focus on the leather seats or the soft music on the radio, anything so I didn't have to think about what was waiting for us. The restaurant was next to a grocery store so we parked there so we weren't so close but still had a view of across the lot. It was just 5 now and neither of our parents seemed to be on time. Typical of my parents but Edward's parents seemed to be the on-time type. A few more minutes and my dad's cruiser pulled in. As they got out my dad looked around apparently trying to locate me. I was too busy watching him to notice when Carlisle's car pulled into a spot not far from my dad. I held my breath. Charlie obviously didn't see because I saw him pull his cell phone out of his pocket and then felt my own vibrate.

"Hello."

"Hey bells where are—" a sharp breath blew through the phone. Oh god. Here we go.


	16. Chapter 16

From across the lot I could see the exact moment when our fathers spotted each other. It was almost a visible thing the wave of tension that passed between them and then the yelling started. Edward grabbed my hand and we sprinted towards our parents. I felt bad for Esme she seemed nervous and unsure of what to do. I couldn't exactly blame her; I still didn't know why I was here.

"What are you doing here Cullen?"

"I'm having dinner with my son. Is that against the law now?"

"Maybe it should be for people like you!" We stopped a few yards away and they were way too wrapped up in their arguing to even notice us. I had to bite my lip, hard to keep from running over there and screaming for them to stop. Charlie took a step towards Carlisle and I instinctively got ready to bolt over there to stop a fight. Edward put his hand on my arm

"It's ok, relax." Easy for him to say he was nearly having an anxiety attack.

"Look why don't you go somewhere else so me and my family can enjoy a nice dinner and there will be no problems."

"You mean like your son has been enjoying my daughter." I squeezed by eyes shut and just imagined I was somewhere else. Not for the first time I was truly regretting this idea.

"Do something." I pushed Edward a little

"Hold on give them a minute." I was going to argue but then I remembered the whole reason behind this and just the thought of having to be away from Edward was enough to make me back down again and watch.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Your son has been spending time with Bella lately." Carlisle seemed confused for a second. He hadn't known that the two of us had been spending a lot of time together and, something my parents didn't know either, that I had gone over to the Cullen's house.

"Edward hasn't been spending any time with your daughter."

"Shows how much you know about your kid." Things were not getting any better. Not that I actually thought they would but that was the plan. They were supposed to fight at first then start talking and eventually work out their differences. _Wake up Bella this isn't a Disney movie. _For the first time I looked at my mother and had to stop. She looked sad. Really sad. I felt a jolt of pain to see my mom looked so unhappy. She didn't want them to be fighting any more than I did. I watched fascinated as she walked over to Esme and shook her hand. Carlisle and Charlie continued to argue but the women talked. I had to smile at this.

"Let's go." I looked up at Edward startled at his abrupt decision to go over to the other parking lot. He took my hand and we calmly strode right up to the group.

"Bella! What are you doing with him?" Edward squeezed my hand and that was all the courage I needed. At least I hoped.

"Dad I've been seeing Edward a lot and I really like him." Charlie stared at me for a second his face getting increasingly redder. It took everything in me not to break down right there.

"I don't know what lies he's filled your head with but this is going to stop right now. Get. In. The. Restaurant." I took a calming breath.

"Dad listen to me I want to be with Edward not because he has lied to me or told me something but because he is just such a great person." If it was possible this just made him angrier. However my mom smiled proudly at me which gave me a small boost of confidence.

"Bella we can talk about this later right now I just want you to go wait for your mother and me in the restaurant."

"No we need to talk about it now."

"Why do we need to do this now?" To this day I still don't know why I said it but the words just fell from my mouth without my permission.

"I'm pregnant." Every face changed to complete shock. Even Edward. He actually seemed the most stunned out of everybody. "Excuse me." I ran into the restaurant with the excuse that I was going to throw up. With my hand to my lips I dashed in and collapsed on the closest chair that wasn't visible from the outside. Edward was right behind me of course.

"Bella why did you say that?"

"I don't know," I sobbed and through myself on his lap. After a minute I wiped my eyes and I looked up and was astonished to see Edward laughing hysterically. "What is so funny?" It came out angrier than I meant it but I was amazed to see that he found anything funny about this.

"You should have seen their faces they were so in shock." He dissolved into laughter again and I couldn't fight back the giggle that escaped me.

"I have to tell them the truth." I got up to go back out and admit that I lied but Edward grabbed my arm and pulled me back to the bench. "What?"

"Don't tell them."

"Why? They think I'm having your baby."

"Yeah and this will force them to work out the conflict and become friends again." He was right but this wasn't the way I wanted it to happen. I would have argue, everything in me told me to say no and tell my parents the truth but when I turned and looked out the window I saw that Charlie and Carlisle were actually talking. Angrily still, but at least they seemed to be having somewhat of a communication.

"Ok fine but as soon as it gets out of hand we tell them the truth." He smiled and took my hand.

"I promise." Out of the corner of my eye I saw movement as watched Carlisle and Esme get into their car and drive out of the parking lot. My dad got in his police cruiser and I was happy to see my mother coming over to get me.

"Hi Edward." I smiled internally that my mom even acknowledged him. Something I was sure my father never would have done.

"Hello Mrs. Swan."

"Bella your father and I are going home. He wants you to say goodbye to Edward and come home." I was sure that wasn't quite the way my father had phrased it but my mom was trying not to hurt my feelings. Right before she turned to walk back outside she shot me a look. It wasn't angry or sad it was almost…determined. She knew. Somehow she knew that I wasn't pregnant and it appeared that at least for now she wasn't going to rat me out to my father and Edward's parents. Maybe she wanted this reconciliation with the Cullens as much as I did. It must be hard on her knowing that it's partly her fault that Charlie and Carlisle aren't friends anymore. When I finally turned back to Edward after they drove away he kissed my lips.

"It's going to be ok." That seemed to be his theme.

"Yeah you're not the one who has to go pretend she is pregnant." I could see him fight a smile and I had to roll my eyes.

"I love you." What little annoyance I had disappeared and I pressed against Edward with all my might and held him in my arms.

"I love you too."

"I promise we will be together." Despite all my fears and doubts I couldn't argue with him. Reluctantly I pulled away and smiled sadly at him. Hand in hand we walked back over to our cars and started home. This wasn't going to be easy but for Edward I would walk through hell and back.


	17. Chapter 17

Once I got home my father was up in his room and I didn't see him for the rest of the night. My mother however, was sitting in the living room when I walked in. I waved to her as I climbed the stairs to my room. She didn't stop me or question me about before but I still got the impression she knew the truth. At least for now it looked like she was going to keep the information from Charlie. I brushed my teeth and started the shower. I made the water unusually hot for me which felt amazing on my back. When I was done I got dressed and laid down on my bed. All I did was stare at the ceiling. I couldn't seem to get the image of Charlie's horrified face out of my mind. To make myself feel better I imagined Edward when he held me or just smiled at me. That was all it took for me to slip into sleep.

_"Isabella here is your baby" the nurse laid the baby down on my chest and I stared at the beautiful little girl. My mother walked in to my hospital room and there were tears on her face_

_"Mom what's wrong." Instinctively I held my baby closer. _

_"Charlie isn't coming." _

_"What do you mean he isn't coming he has to see his grandchild."  
"He said he can't have a grandchild when he doesn't even have a child of his own." _

I shot bolt upright in my bed and wiped away the tears I must have cried in my sleep. Would Charlie really disown me for having Edward's baby? I had to tell him the truth even if it meant my father still hating the Cullens. I went to the bathroom and splashed water on my face. It was only 3:30 so I still had a while before I had to get ready for school. Thankfully it was Friday. I took a deep breath and went back to my room. It didn't take long for me to fall back to sleep and this time I didn't dream at all. In the morning my eyes were all puffy and there were bags under them.

"Bella are you ok?" My mother seemed genuinely concerned and came over to examine my face while my father quickly finished his coffee and went back upstairs to his room.

"I didn't get a lot of sleep last night but I'll be ok." The last thing I needed was for her to start worrying about an imaginary unborn baby's health.

"Your father wants you to go to the doctor today to make sure you really are…"

"Ok" I responded saving both of us the embarrassment of her finishing the thought. "Mom I have to-" I was cut off by an abrupt knock at the door. I exchanged a confused glance with my mother then shuffled over to the door to answer it and opened it.

"Edward, what are you doing here are you crazy my father is already mad enough." He didn't seem fazed by my worries he just put his arms around me

"Sorry I just didn't want to wait until school to see you." I buried my face in his shirt and just enjoyed the sensation for a moment. Then reality set in and I pulled away.  
"I better get my things before my dad sees you." I took a step back inside just to grab my school bag and a second later came back out and took Edward's hand. We walked in silence to his car. I knew I wouldn't be able to relax until I admitted to my father that I wasn't really pregnant but for right now I just sat in silence next to Edward. I tried to just enjoy being with him but I couldn't seem to make the stress go away.

At school he kissed my lips and pulled me against him and for just a second all my troubles were forgotten and I could imagine me and Edward together somewhere, anywhere and nothing in the world could come between us. Just as fast he dropped his arms and walked away towards his first class. I felt the separation like a blast of frigid air across my skin.

"Bella!" I turned to see Alice waving and rushing over to me. "How did it go yesterday?" Horrible, terrible, a disaster, all of those adjectives and more I could have used to describe it but instead I just said,

"Not well." She gave me a sympathetic look and as we walked to class I told her everything that happened. How Charlie and Carlisle fought and first all the way up to my false admittance to being pregnant.

"Wow Bells, pregnant not exactly your best idea." I laughed humorlessly. Edward's arrival this morning had stopped me before but I knew I had to tell Charlie this afternoon whether Edward was there or not. Especially if he wanted me to go to the doctor today. For once I was actually glad that I didn't have either Angela or Edward in either of my first two classes I just needed some time to think by myself for a little while. That was the plan but as the day progressed I found it easier just to focus all my attention on my work which seemed to make all remaining stress fade. At lunch I was even able to laugh and enjoy joking with Alice like I used to. By the end of the day my mood was far brighter. I even smiled cheerfully at Edward as he waited by his car to drive me home. Before he got a chance to I pulled him into a tight embrace and kissed his lips aggressively. He laughed and pulled back to look at me.

"You're certainly in a better mood." I snuggled closer against him and nodded.

"Yes I am." We got in the car and I turned on the music and even sang along a little but I stopped and blushed when I caught Edward peaking over at me. My mood suddenly dimmed though when we pulled in front of the house and saw not only Charlie's police cruiser in the driveway but also a black car.

"My dad's car." I turned worried eyes over to Edward when he said this, nerves once again surfacing. He grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the car. However when we were outside I could hear some strange noise. I strained to hear Edward appearing to hear the same thing. It sounded like…

"Hissing?" I questioned. He shook his head.

"Laughing."


	18. Chapter 18

Who could possibly be laughing around here? My parents think I'm having a baby at 17 my boyfriend (technically) wasn't even really allowed to be going out with me. It didn't make sense that somebody was laughing like this. Edward took my hand and we walked into the house. I was just putting my school bag on the table when I saw them in the backyard.

"No way." I turned to Edward who has apparently just saw the same thing I did. We walked over to the back door making sure neither of them saw us. Sitting in the back were Carlisle and my father laughing. Not just talking to come to some agreement because of me but actually being friendly. I never even dreamed that this would happen. Considering the fact that they used to be best friends it didn't seem completely impossible but I knew it was going to be harder than this. That's what I had prepared myself for. The fight of my life because I was having a baby and we were going to all be a big family. Man, I had really gotten myself into a mess this time. What was I thinking? _At least it seems to have brought together my dad and Charlie_, I consoled myself. Before I could talk him out of it Edward opened the back door and dragged me out with him.

"Bells!" I nearly jumped at my father's cheerful voice. When I last saw him he had been furious with me but now he seemed normal. No, not normal but closer. Maybe he forgot I'm pregnant. I wasn't about to remind him. I forced a half smile.

"Hey dad."

"Bella I'm sorry about getting so upset yesterday. I talked things out with Carlisle" his voice became a little less happy but the smile remained on his face "and I'm going to accept this." His eyes slid over to Edward and this time the smile did go. I couldn't actually blame him though, he was the one that got his little girl pregnant. At least he believes he is.

"Thanks dad." That's the only thing I could say without giving myself away with the guilt that was fast building up. I had never been good at lying but if I kept this up I would become an expert in no time. As fast as I could without being too obvious I turned and went back into the house with Edward right on my heels. As soon as the door was closed Edward confronted me.

"Why didn't you tell them the truth?" It was a logical question but I didn't really know the answer myself.

"They were getting along and I thought that if I told him the truth it would ruin their newfound friendship." Edward looking like he wanted to argue but I turned away from him and headed into the kitchen.

"Bella you're going to have to tell them the truth soon. Especially when you don't start showing." I bit my lip. He was right and I knew it. I opened my mouth to respond but then quickly shut it. What could I say? What could we do, actually get pregnant so our dads wouldn't fight again? That was stupid. All this stress was affecting my mental functioning. I didn't even realize I was starting to shake until I felt Edward's arms around me and pull me against him.

"I'll tell him but let's just wait to see if this truce will stick." Edward sighed.

"Ok but only a couple days." I wrapped my arms tighter around him. It was cruel to lie but I was so close to actually being allowed to be with Edward and that was just too tempting an offer to pass up. We just stayed like that until I heard the back door open then I quickly jumped away from Edward and opened the refrigerator to look for something to make for dinner. I was pulling the chicken out when Charlie walking into the kitchen. He didn't acknowledge Edward but that was at least better than giving him a dirty look.

"Hey Bella don't bother with dinner tonight Carlisle just invited us over to his house for dinner. You could think of it as a dinner to bury the hatchet." I nearly dropped the chicken. Slowly I shut the fridge door after putting the chicken back.

"Sure, sounds fun." I desperately wanted to see what Edward was thinking but Charlie was blocking my view of him. Charlie turned and glanced at Edward before walking out of the kitchen and I waited until the door closed once more before saying anything. However Edward beat me to it.

"This is not good."

"It's just dinner."

"You don't know my mom. All she's going to talk about is this baby." Oh. Right. For a second I almost forgot that all this peace was based on a complete lie. Next time I was not going to be the one to come up with the plans. I felt like I was going to be sick. Well at least that would give more proof to my pregnancy story. Although at this point I'm not sure that would be in my best interest. Carlisle stayed for a few more minutes but then left to get things ready for dinner. Edward went with him and I quickly made my way to my room before Charlie could say anything more to me about that would cause me to come up with more lies. I stared at my reflection in the mirror trying to imagine myself with my stomach stretched with a baby. Yeah, I definitely was not going to be the one coming up with the plan.

"Yeah I'm due in April." I practiced what I would say to Esme is she asked me questions. April? Did that even come out right? I sighed and collapsed on my bed. Edward was right, this was bad. I had no idea how I was going to handle this. Maybe I could just pretend I was sick and stay home. Pregnant people are sick it wouldn't Charlie suspicious. No, I couldn't leave Edward to answer all the questions by himself. I must have drifted off to sleep because the sky was darker when I opened my eyes again and I heard a lot of movement coming from downstairs.

"Bella! We're leaving in 5 minutes." I bolted up remembering where we were going. I stretched and fixed my hair to look at least presentable. Before I lost the nerve I squared my shoulders and walked out of room. This was not going to be good.


	19. Chapter 19

I was only slightly relieved to not be the only one obviously uncomfortable about going over to the Cullen's house. My mother didn't try very hard to conceal that fact although the reasons were probably completely different for why we felt this way. My father however seemed completely at ease as he pulled into their driveway which was the most disturbing at all. Maybe he missed Carlisle more than I thought. I mentally cringed when I saw that Carlisle and Esme were waiting for us right in front of their door. It was too much to hope that Edward was with them. However I was pleasantly surprised when he appeared next to Carlisle a second later.  
"Bella I'm so happy to see you." Edward gave me an I told you so look before Esme pulled me in for an embrace.

"I'm happy to be here." I said it so quietly I wasn't even sure if she heard me but the smile never left her face. This was going to be a long night. She guided us through the house to the dining room where the table was already set.

"Oh this is beautiful." I guess my mom's discomfort was gone. Or she was just a lot better at hiding it than me.

"Thank you." Esme said. As I glanced at my mother I noticed that not once did she even look at Carlisle. At least her problem wasn't a complete lie. Quickly I sat down in the seat next to Edward and grabbed his hand. His squeezed it and some of my tension eased. Charlie looked at our joined hands and didn't seem too pleased but he was quickly distracted when Carlisle offered him a drink.

"So Bella how are you feeling? Any morning sickness yet?" Not for the reason she meant but I was definitely feeling sick lately. Of course I didn't say this I just politely smiled and shook my head.

"No I'm feeling fine."

"That's good. I know I was terribly sick for months when I was pregnant with Edward." I had to fight a laugh while Charlie shifted uncomfortably. Ha. Serves him right for making me go to this awkward dinner. My mom remained quiet which pretty much proved to me that she knew the truth about me. Although I was having a hard time figuring out why she didn't tell Charlie. Did she want this renewed friendship with the Cullens last as much as I did? "Yeah, but the delivery was…" thankfully Carlisle interrupted, politely of course to ask if everyone was ready to eat. We all enthusiastically said yes and he and Esme left to go get it. Ironically they brought out fried chicken and corn which was what I was planning to make.

"Looks good." I said politely which earned me an approving look from Charlie. Although I could have sworn I heard Edward snort. Thankfully no one else seemed to hear so I just dismissed it as my imagination. Everyone ate quietly which was fine for me. It actually should have felt more comfortable because this is usually how we ate at home. My mom and I would sometimes have small conversations but dinner is usually a pleasantly peaceful time. However this was awkward silence which I hated.

"Excuse me can I use your bathroom?" Everyone turned eyes to me and I had to fight the blush that wanted to break out on my cheeks.

"Sure sweetie it's the first door up the stairs." I nodded my thanks to Esme and quickly walked out of the room. I couldn't stop the small sigh that escaped me when I was away from all that weird tension. What was Charlie thinking coming to their house for dinner when things were barely patched up? While everyone was in the other room I briefly looked over the pictures that I missed when I was here last time. I was almost at the last when I noticed a picture of Edward playing the piano. Tentatively I reached out my hand and brought it closer. He was playing in on a stage but it was definitely a couple years old.

"That was the last year I took lessons." I whipped around just bare holding on to the picture. Edward smiled at me. After a couple seconds of letting my heart rate get back to normal I answered him.

"I didn't know you could play piano." It was a pretty moronic response but I was still reeling from my near heart attack. I wasn't usually this jumpy but being in this house put me on edge. Although considering it was Edward's house and how utterly comfortable I was with him that didn't seem to make sense.

"Yeah, I took lessons for several years." For the first time I noticed over on the far side on the room there was a piano.

"Oh." I exclaimed dumbly. Edward laughed at me and grabbed my hand.  
"Do you want me to play something?" I did. More than anything. But that would cause the rest of the house to come in here and I was really avoiding that.

"Maybe some other time." It nearly broke my heart to say it. I think he knew my reasoning though, because he didn't seem offended at all. Still, I felt like I was depriving myself of something really wonderful. Hand in hand we went back into the dining room. The table was cleared of everything from dinner and was replaced by things for dessert and some type of pie that appeared to be apple. It was so delicious I actually asked for a second slice to Esme's absolute happiness. Soon I actually began relaxing and just having a good time.

"Well it was really fantastic thank you so much for inviting us over," my mom finally said nearly an hour later. I'm sure that was what my dad would have wanted to say but she was definitely the more socially comfortable of my parents. I got my social habits from my dad obviously.

"You're welcome. Feel free to come over any time you want." Yeah, right. We all stood up and began walking back out to the car. Edward took my hand and I grinned up at him. I actually had a good time and had a real positive attitude about the whole experience. That was until I heard Esme's next words. "Bella, how about you come over tomorrow and we can go baby shopping." The smile disappeared and I flinched. Oh this could _not_ be happening. For a second I considered just telling her the truth but something told me now wasn't the time to do it. Swiftly I turned back around being sure I had some sort of happy expression.

"Sure that sounds like fun." If it was possible her smile grew.

"Wonderful. I'll call you tomorrow and we can decide on a time." All I could manage was nod and then I continued walking back to the car. Faster this time.

"It will be ok." I rounded on Edward

"How will it be ok? What am I supposed to do, go shopping for a nonexistent baby?"

"Maybe you could tell everyone the truth." I bit my lip and glanced over at where Carlisle and Charlie were talking. I had to do it sometime, sometime soon. After all how long could I say I was pregnant before they started expecting to see me again weight.

"Yeah maybe I'll do that." He leaned over and kissed my forehead.

"Everything will work out," he breathed into my hair. I laid my cheek against his chest and sighed.

"I really hope your right"


	20. Chapter 20

3:01 am. I hadn't had a single second of sleep all night. Obviously this lie couldn't continue for long but I kept debating with myself when was the best time to tell everyone. Then when I thought I had finally figured out what I should do another thought would occur to me. What if I did get pregnant? This could just be my sleep-deprived brain losing most of its functioning but the idea kind of appealed to me. It also terrified me so then I would end up back where I started. I rolled over onto my side and stared out my window. It was hard to see almost anything but the one street lamp made it possible to at least make some stuff out. I'm not sure how long I lay like that but just when my eyes started to droop closed a figure appeared outside my window. I swear my heart stopped for half second and my blood ran ice cold. Until of coarse Edward smiled at me and I shot up off my mattress.

"What are you doing here? Are you trying to give me a heart attack?" I tried to sound angry but between exhaustion and relief that it wasn't actually someone I should be afraid of I didn't sound that intimidating.

"I figured you would be up worrying." He knew me so well. Normally I would have let the thought comfort me but I was already feeling an ocean of emotions and there was no room for such a positive feeling as comfort.

"Yeah. I'm so confused about what I should do." I sat down on my bed pulling Edward beside me and laying my head on his shoulder. My eyes closed on their own and I had to fight to hear his response.

"Just tell her you lied and why you did it. She's an understanding woman she won't be mad. At least not very." I wanted to say something. Tell him that it didn't feel right to me to admit the truth just yet but my exhaustion (and the stress relief of Edward's presence) got the better of me and I drifted into sleep.

I didn't feel rested when I opened my eyes but I knew I wouldn't be able to get back to sleep. Already my day was starting on a bad side. My window shade was open letting in the sun and I buried my head under my pillow. It took a second for the memory of last night and what I had to do today to come back to me. Even though I was asleep I had made a decision. I wasn't going to tell anybody there wasn't a baby today. It wasn't fair and I felt terrible but I needed to work through some things. I was going to be late for school if I wasn't already but that still didn't motivate me to get up. Maybe I could stay home sick and then Esme would decide I should stay home. That wouldn't really fix my problem though, just postpone the inevitable. But was it inevitable? Was I really willing to be a mother at 17 to keep me and Edward's parents from hating each other? Was that even really the reason behind me wanting to have a baby with Edward? Luckily the door bell rang just then stopping my endless thoughts. Undoubtedly it was Edward come to drive me to school. I was surprised however when I opened the door to see my best friend.

"Alice!" I cried and through myself into her arms. I don't know why I was so happy to see. Maybe it was the fact that since all these problems with Edward it felt like I barely spend any time with her.

"Bella, what's wrong is everything ok?" Her voice was panicked and I felt bad for worrying her for no reason. She pushed me back a little to inspect my face.

"No I'm ok I just have a lot on my mind right now." She gave a sympathetic and questioning look. Alice is the only person I would even consider telling that I was thinking about having a baby. Except Edward of course but that is pretty much a given. "We need to talk." So like any best friend would do she agreed to skip school and we drove to the park nearby. Alice pulled into an empty parking space and cut the engine. Up until that second I didn't think about how my missing school would worry Edward. Worry and confuse him. I probably should have told him I wasn't going but it was too late now.

"Ok Bella what is your stressing about so much?" I sigh preparing myself for everything I'm about to say. But like usual for me instead of starting out with last night and building but to my thoughts I just blurt out my biggest issue without thinking of how it sounds.

"I'm thinking of having a baby." As soon as the words were out I winced and my cheeks turned bright red. I turned to her. She just stared at me for several seconds. After a minute of nothing I feel bad for even telling her. I should have just kept it to myself and not burdened her with my ridiculous mess. "Alice–"

"A…baby." I nod, unsure of how she feels about this. Her facial expression is one of shock but I can tell she is thinking really hard about what to say. "That's," horrible, irresponsible, terrible, outrageous, disgusting, I'm ready for any of those words to come out of her mouth so for the second time today she surprises me by saying "interesting." A breath I didn't even know I was holding rushes out of me for her not condemning me for being a bad person.

"I know it sounds crazy but everyone believes I already am and I'm afraid that if I tell them the truth,"

"Your parents will go back to hating each other," she finished for me. She still seemed to be thinking hard but the look of shock was gone.

"Yeah." She reached out and put her hand on top of mine. I turned and gave her a sad smile.

"Have you talked to Edward about this?" I bit my lip. The idea of bringing this subject up to Edward is not something that I look forward to to say the least. I was even more afraid of his reaction than I was of Alice's He already didn't like that I was keeping this lie up for so long.

"No." She squeezed my hand.

"You two should talk." She didn't have to tell me but hearing it made up my mind just the same. Finally I let the tears that I had been holding off all this time flow down my cheeks. Alice hugged me while I cried for several minutes not saying anything. When I thought I was calm enough I pulled back and wiped the remaining tears.

"I should probably get back home." While Alice started the car I took out my phone and saw two text messages from Edward. I knew he'd worry. I opened the first one.

_Where are you? _That was at 8:00 this morning.

_What's wrong?_ This one was sent at 9:15 which caused me to check the clock and was surprised to notice it was almost 1 in the afternoon. Quickly I texted back even though he probably already left school in search of my whereabouts.

_I'm fine just not feeling well. _We were almost to my house when I got a response.

_I'm in your room. _My heart rate picked and I was both excited and a little nervous. I didn't know if I was ready to have this conversation but he would know something was bothering me.

"Are you going to be ok?" I leaned over and hugged Alice tightly. Mostly because I was really grateful for her talking to me and making me feel somewhat better about the situation but also just to buy myself some time.

"I'll be ok. I'll call you later and let you know how everything went." As slowly as I could without being too obvious I was stalling I got out and waved to her as she drove off. Taking a deep breath I turned around and looked up at my window knowing he would be there. As soon as I saw his face my heart lifted and I smiled broadly at him. He returned it but even from this distance I can see he's not entirely happy with me. Maybe I'll wait to talk to him about my idea.


	21. Chapter 21

Several seconds went by and all we did was look at each other. I couldn't for the life of me figure out what he was trying to see in my face. I started out ecstatic to see him but soon it drifted towards trepidation. I would never fear Edward but I was a little (well more than a little) curious as to what he was thinking. I was the one to finally break the eye contact and start walking forwards. I counted every step I took as I went through the front door and up the stairs. Edward was waiting for me at my bedroom door.

"Hey." To my relief his voice was cheerful and I smiled once again and took his offered hand.

"I'm sorry I didn't call." Now that I was sure he wasn't angry with me I wasn't nervous to bring up the subject. Although I still hadn't made up my mind about whether or not I should ask him about the baby thing. Better to be on more solid footing with him.

"What did you do all day?" He asked it casually but I could tell he was anxious for my answer. I took an extra second to think. He raised an eyebrow at me.

"I was just talking with Alice." I looked away knowing I was going to have to lie if he pressed for details.

"Hmm." I continued to look around waiting for him to say more but when he didn't I leaned back and looked into his eyes.

"How was school?"

"Fine I only missed my last two classes but I can catch up." This I did not doubt. More awkward silence followed and I realized this was the second time that happened with Edward. Although in fairness last night wasn't really his fault.

"You didn't have to leave school." It was a stupid thing to say and I knew it. This would only lead back to me and what I was talking to Alice about.

"I was worried about you. You didn't call or text or let me know you weren't coming the whole morning." I shut my eyes tightly hoping to fight off the guilt. "What were you talking to Alice about that was so important you couldn't let me know you were ok?" This was worse than the guilt. I couldn't take time to think about my words because then he would know I was lying but I was really terrible at thinking on my feet.

"Just the situation and what a mess I made."

"And?" Damn he was too smart for his own good.

"That's all I just needed someone to talk to. Someone not directly involved." There that wasn't a complete lie and I made sure he didn't think I didn't want to talk to him.

"I don't know what you could possibly have to think through when the solution is obvious." Yeah, I knew he meant tell the truth. I really should have just listened but for some reason the idea of actually getting pregnant was almost as appealing. Our families already accepted it and telling the truth would only cause fighting again. With all these thought I didn't notice Edward hadn't looked away and was staring at me intently. It felt like everything I was thinking was being blasted on a loud speaker into my room for him to hear.

"I know but until then I just wanted…to talk." For the moment at least he seemed satisfied. We went and had a lunch out back on the picnic table since I hadn't eaten anything and was starving and I figured Edward hadn't eaten either. After we finished I cleaned everything up and went back up to my room. Lunch had been nice but I wasn't sure if this was a good time to bring up having a baby. I mentally cringed when I actually thought the words.

"Edward—"

"Are you still going shopping with my mom today?" I'd almost forgotten. Well one problem at a time.

"Yeah, I guess." If I at least had it in my head that I _might _be pregnant in the near future I wouldn't feel so guilty about baby shopping with Edward's mom. At least I hoped not.

"She's really excited about going." This fact didn't seem to make him happy. I desperately wanted to say something to make him not feel so bad about all of this but I couldn't even think of anything to say to myself. I started to panic which was not a good thing. I didn't think clearly when I was panicking and usually said things I would later regret as I just recently demonstrated.

"It will be ok," I mimicked his words from last night. I'm sure I didn't sound as convincing as he did though. His mood suddenly switched and he smiled at me lifting the cloud that was starting to form over my thoughts.

"I know I just know she's really exciting about having a grandchild and I don't want to disappoint her." I took his hand and kissed it then pressed it against my cheek.

"She won't be." Thankfully he didn't seem to grasp my double meaning and just pulled me against him. He left shortly after that so my parents wouldn't know he was there. When he was gone I realized I had to take a different approach. If I was really going to do this I couldn't just ask Edward. I was going to have to just seduce him. The thought made me blush. It was definitely easier said than done. Sure you'd think seducing Edward Cullen would be the simplest thing but I had to be subtle. I decided to just think about it later.

A bout an hour later my mom got home and I greeted her warmly. We didn't talk a lot recently which I was actually happy about. At least today I had the excuse that I was going shopping with Esme so I had to go upstairs and get ready. As I was changing and brushing my hair my mind was all over the place. One of my worst habits and probably was my least favorite. Whenever I had free time I tended to over think everything. Like how was I going to trick Edward into getting me pregnant? Or if I decided I just needed to tell everyone the truth when I was going to do this? Fortunately I was out of time so I had to pause my busy brain.

"Edward's here," my mother called from downstairs. I took one more quick look in the mirror before leaving my room. I gave my mom a hug and told her I'd be back later tonight then followed Edward out to his car. It was several minutes before I even realized we weren't heading in the direction of his house. I peered around confused for a second trying to see if I could figure out where he was taking us by what was around. When I was thoroughly stumped I turned a confused look on Edward.

"Where are we going? I thought I was going shopping with your mom" He didn't even take his eyes off the road.

"Change of plans." Huh? I didn't change anything, did Edward?

"Oh…" I let the word hang there hoping he would fill in all the missing blanks. When he didn't I pressed. "So what's going on?" Before he answered I looked out the windshield and saw we were at the same park me and Alice went to this morning. Finally Edward turned to me.

"So… you want to get pregnant for real now?"


	22. Chapter 22

If you were to ask me the most surprising thing that has happened to me in the last year this morning I would have said Edward showing up at my birthday party. I'm pretty sure this tops that. This had to be a dream. Or maybe I was just having a hallucination because there was no way Edward Cullen just asked me what I think he just did. He stared at me expectantly like I shouldn't have been shocked at all by what he said. I opened my mouth to say something but the only noise that came out was a small squeak. Edward's expression became teasing.

"Isn't that what you wanted?" He moved closer to me and I blinked rapidly trying to clear my brain. Was that what I wanted? Yes, some part of my brain answered, this is your chance. I was so confused I could barely form some type of response.

"I...I don't know." Maybe Edward was joking. Yeah, that seemed probable. I could just play along until Edward gets tired and we can go back to his house and I can go shopping with his mom like we planned.

"Yes you do Bella." Closer still. My heart began to beat steadily faster. My breathing hitched and suddenly I felt like I really needed to open the windows. Slowly I moved my hand over to the switch and pushed it down. The cool air that blew across my face felt wonderful. Edward was only inches from my face and he was still waiting for me to say something.

"I want to be with you." As soon as they were out I regretted it. My words could be taken two ways and I'm pretty sure I knew which way he would assume I meant. He smiled at me.

"See. I told you" Before he moved again I put my hand on his chest and tried to slow my breaths.

"Why… how." I wasn't doing well. He definitely was taking advantage of my shocked state of mind. He planned this. I knew I should be mad but with everything else I was trying to process there didn't seem to be room for anger. With each passing second Edward became more and more amused. Then I knew. Alice! I gasped and for a moment Edward looked worried. "Alice." He moved back over to his side of the car and I relaxed slightly.

"Yeah I talked to her. Took a long time to get anything out of her too. I don't think she likes me very much." A small smile broke across my face. It was true; Alice wasn't a big fan of Edward's. Nothing close to how my dad felt but she didn't really trust the Cullens. For a second I wondered if maybe it actually bothered her that I was going out with Edward.

"What did she tell you?" I looked at my feet while as I asked.

"That you thought having a baby would make everything ok." That wasn't exactly what I said but I didn't want to point that out right then.

"Not everything I just think it would be easier."

"You think raising a kid for 18 years would be easier than just telling them that we lied?" Well when he put it like that of course my idea sounded bad. I wasn't going to tell him that though so I just tried a different approach.

"You don't want to have a kid with me?" Ah good old guilt. I'd been feeling enough of it lately it was about time I got a break. His face softened a bit but he still looked like he was about to roll his eyes. Normally his look would have made me laugh but I didn't think me making light of this serious situation would make him happy.

"That's not what I meant." Welcome back guilt. Amazing how just a few words could make me feel such intense emotions.

"Edward," he turned to me and I felt like I was falling even harder for him. "I just think we should think about it." He looked like he was thinking hard and I just sat there while he made up his mind. Finally after what to me felt like hours but actually was only about 3 minutes he sighed.

"Fine I'll think about it." Then he turned on the car and we were back on the road. His expression remained sad and we didn't say anything more as we drove. I wanted desperately to say now that it was all out in the open I felt better but I didn't. It was only 5:30 when we pulled into Edward's driveway but his mom was outside waiting anyway. As soon as I was out the door she embraced me but this time her kindness didn't make me feel uncomfortable.

"Hello Mrs. Cullen."

"Oh please call me Esme." Please don't mention the baby please don't mention the baby "after all you are the mother of my grandchild." Ouch! I didn't even look over to see how Edward took that one. Thankfully she didn't lead me towards the house but just over to her car that was right next to Edward's. I opened my door but I didn't get in. I wrapped my arms tightly around Edward and pulled him down to my lips.

"I'll be at your house later tonight so we can talk." He seemed back to his old self which made me feel a little less bad going on this trip.

"Ok I'll try to be there as soon as I can." He kissed my forehead one last time and then back away from the car. Esme was already in the car so I quickly climbed in and shut the door. I waved to Edward as we backed down the driveway trying to calm myself and prepare for all the questions I might have to answer in the next hour or so.

"How are you feeling Bella?" I smiled over at her.

"I feel ok." Good, first question down and I didn't even have to make anything up. The place we pulled up to made me cringe. It was a store for maternity clothes. I guess I should have figured she'd want to get things for me but I just assumed we were buying things like bibs and bottles.

"You probably won't need these things for a couple months but it's always good to be prepared." I laughed nervously and got out. There wasn't a lot of people in the store only 2 workers and one customer. The other woman was much farther along than I was or was telling people I was. She looked up and smiled at me when me and Esme walked by which I returned.

"When are you due?" I flinched but turned back keeping my composure. When would I be due? It was October so…

"Not until May." Quickly I recounted in my head. That meant to them I was 2 months pregnant already. Maybe I should have said later but it was too late now and I wasn't even sure if Esme heard. She was a couple feet over looking at some shirts.

"I'm due in 3 weeks and I'm really nervous." I gave her a sympathetic look and nodded.

"Me too." That one was a partial lie. I was nervous but not for the same reason she meant.

"Good luck."

"You too." I joined Esme and pretended to look at clothes. It really didn't matter to me what she picked because I wasn't going to be wearing it anyway. At least not any time soon.

"Ohh this is very cute, Bella look." This went on for a while and we ended up buying 4 shirts and 5 pants. I made a mental note to somehow pay her back for everything she was getting. Our next stop was baby's r us which made me feel better. This would be stuff for the baby not me. Of course it was just my luck that I was beginning to relax when we saw someone at the end of the stroller aisle that I knew. Angela.


	23. Chapter 23

Angela!? She was at the far end of the aisle and she hadn't seemed to notice me. All I could think about was that I was about to get caught and I would break Esme's heart. 

"I need bibs." Esme looked over at me a bit taken aback. 

"We have plenty of time. We can look at them next." Nervously I glanced over to see if Angela was any closer. She was gone. I repressed the urge to sigh and smiled at Esme. When did I become so good at these fake smiles? 

"Yeah ok, great." She turned back to a stroller she was admiring. No way was I going to let her buy me a nice, expensive thing like that. As we walked I couldn't help but scan the surrounding people to see if any of them were Angela or anyone else I might recognize for that matter. Not for the first time I thought about how inconvenient it was to live in such a small town. Usually I loved it but sometimes it definitely got in the way. Esme's laughing brought me out of my thoughts.

"Bella look at these." I moved next to where she was in front of the bibs and bent down to the one she was reading. _Who needs the lotto, I got grandma _I giggled and put it in the cart. If that was the one she liked who was I to deny her. To my dismay we got several other things, diapers, blankets, bottles, baby bag. Each time she added something to the ever-growing pile I felt a new round of guilt. No matter what it took I decided I was going to pay her back. Finally we were ready to go and we were standing at the checkout. 

"Bella?" Oh no! I'd forgotten Angela was even here. Several items ago I'd stopped looking at every person we passed. 

"Hey Angela." Thankfully Esme seemed to be reading one of the mother's magazines and wasn't paying attention to me. Not yet anyway. 

"What are you doing here?" Wasn't that the million dollar question. Of coarse this was the moment Esme decided to look over. 

"Oh hello I'm Esme Cullen, Edward's mom." Angela smiled at her. For a second I closed my eyes and prayed that this was all a dream and I would wake up in my room. Nope they were still there, staring at me like I'd lost my mind. Guess it was my turn to say something. 

"We're just shopping for some things. How are you doing?" I had to get the conversation away from me but if I was judging by the way Esme was grinning from ear to ear that wouldn't last long. 

"Good. My cousin is coming for a visit this weekend and he's only 1 so my mom wanted me to get some things just in case my aunt forgot something. Who is all that stuff for?" _Think Bella think!!_

"Oh it's all for the baby. I'm going to be a grandmother!" Angela's eyes just moved over to meet mine and her mouth dropped open slightly. I wanted desperately to tell her it was a lie and that we were only claiming this so me and Edward could be together but I kept my mouth shut. 

"Bella your pregnant?"

No! "Yeah." Then, to my absolute horror, I broke down and sobbed. Both Esme and Angela held me but I couldn't stop the tears. To make it worse they didn't even know why I was crying. I hated lying to these people I cared about for my own selfish needs. I needed to make a decision and fast. Either I was going to get pregnant for I was going to tell everyone the truth. 

"Shh, its ok Bella we're all here for you don't worry." 

"Don't cry you know I'll do everything I can." Their kind words just made me cry harder. I didn't deserve them I didn't deserve something as great as Edward and his family. I was a terrible, horrible person. After several more tears, and tissues, I wiped away the tears and got up from the bench they had brought me over to. When I looked up I wished I hadn't. The employees were giving me sympathetic looks. If they only knew the truth, they'd probably shun me. As they should. 

"Excuse me." Angela moved to the side and revealed a short girl who was an employee and a few years older than me. "Don't feel bad you wouldn't believe how often stuff like that actually happens here." Yeah, I doubt for the reason I have. "If you'd like we're actually looking for another cashier. A job may make things a little easier. " They were offering me a job? More kindness that I didn't deserve. My first instinct was to immediately say no but that would be pretty rude considering they didn't even know anything about except I'd made a fool of myself in public. I smiled warmly and got to my feet. "Thank you. That would be wonderful actually." The girl returned the smile. 

"Great, come in tomorrow about 9 am and we'll get a schedule." I thanked her several more times until finally we paid for out stuff and emerged in the fresh air once again. Esme kept her arm around me and eyed me a lot to make sure I wasn't going to have another melt down. 

"I'll see you tomorrow at school." Angela gave me one more sad look before turning and getting into her car. 

"Come on Bella." I got in next to Esme and just stared out the window. That was an even bigger disaster than I'd feared. Although at least I got a job. When we pulled into the Cullen's driveway I was surprised to not see Edward waiting out front for us. "Bella you shouldn't feel bad." I turned to look at Esme, a bit startled that she said anything. The ride back had been a silent one and I hadn't expected her to break it. "You've taken this very well and you should be proud of yourself." I nodded.

"Thanks." With the bags in hand we took the steps up into the house. It was warm and welcoming but empty. I followed Esme into the living room where we put all the bags. 

"Do you want to leave everything here?" 

"If that's ok with you." 

"Absolutely." I knew I couldn't handle having to look at all these baby things every single day. Every time I looked at this stuff I felt less and less about myself. How could I let these great people buy me all this stuff. Fortunately though, now I had a job and repaying this debt would be that much easier. I checked the clock and gasped. 9:30. "What's wrong?" 

"I just didn't realize it was so late." 

"Oh I'm sorry sweetie I didn't mean to keep you out this long. I'll take you home right now." 

"No it's ok--" then I remembered how I'd gotten here. Where was Edward? It was unlike him to disappear. I guess I knew how he felt this morning when I hadn't come to school. Not a good feeling at all. "ok thanks." 

We pulled up to my house and I thanked her once again. She waited until the front door was closed behind me before I heard her drive off. Part of me expected to see Edward waiting in my room but he didn't appear at my window like this afternoon. I smelled the remains of dinner coming from the kitchen. The TV was also on and I could hear soft breathing on the couch. 

"Bella?" 

"Yeah mom it's me." She came out of the kitchen with water on the front of her shirt and her hair was all messed up. My mom wasn't exactly an expert chef but her meals were always edible. 

"Did you have an ok time?" 

"Yeah it was ok." I decided not to tell my parents about getting the job until I absolutely had to. 

"Did you eat? There's some meatloaf left over that I could warm up for you." It wasn't until that moment that I realized I was starving. As if on cue my stomach grumbled loudly. I blushed. "I'll take that as a yes," she said with a chuckle. When the food was sufficiently hot I took it up to my room. As I opened the door I made a quick prayer that Edward was waiting for me. Guess my luck is gone. The room was dark and uninviting as I walked in switching on the light. 

"Edward where are you?" I set down the plate on my dresser and opened my window. There was no noise except far off cars and some usual late night bugs. I shivered and pushed it down again. As I ate my dinner I tried not to dwell on how this night had gone so bad. When I was finished I laid down on my bed in the darkness watching the shadows on my ceiling. I must have drifted to sleep sometime during the night but I don't know how long it took. I do know, however that Edward did not come to my night. 


	24. Chapter 24

My eyes felt like 20 pound weights the next morning. The sun was barely up but I knew no more sleep was coming. I still had a few hours to kill before I had to be at the store to get my schedule. Looks like I was going to be late for school today. So much for my excellent attendance record. Groggily I got up from my bed and walked to the bathroom. For a shower The hot water relaxed me somewhat so I stayed in longer than I usually would have. By the time I was finished and dressed I could hear my parents downstairs moving quickly to leave for work. They didn't know I missed school yesterday and I wasn't about to let them know I was going to miss part today. When I heard the front door close and the cars drive off I made my way downstairs and sat at the kitchen table. However this time I remembered I needed to text Edward to let him know I'd be late. The last thing I needed was a repeat of the day before.

_Got a job so I'm going to be late for school. See you this afternoon. I missed you last night._

I sent the text and waited a few minutes for a response. When none came I poured some cereal and busied myself with some homework I needed to finish. I wasn't going to let his ignoring me make me paranoid. He probably just had a lot to do. I couldn't possibly be the only priority in his life and it would be conceited of me to think so. As I was getting up to put my dishes in the sink my phone buzzed causing the bowl to tumbled from my hands and onto the floor.

"Great." At least it didn't break. Quickly I wiped up the spilled milk and set the bowl and spoon in the sink. My heart pounded as I grabbed my phone and opened the text.

_I know, my mom told me. See you later. _That it? No I missed you too, sorry I couldn't be there last night? What had I done to cause him to be so distant with me? Unbidden tears sprang into my eyes and I just as fast rubbed them away. I was overreacting, so what if he hadn't come over that didn't mean I'd done something wrong. However much I told myself this though, I couldn't seem to shake the wary feeling that I had done something to drive Edward away from me.

The ride to Babies "R" Us was filled with doubt. My whole focus was on trying to figure out how to fix this problem. It didn't make sense that just because I hadn't spilled the beans about the pregnancy that he was so mad at me. I pulled into a spot and walked into the warm building.

"Hey there, glad you came." That same girl from yesterday was walking over to me with some papers in her hand. I took a deep breath and met her half way.

"Good morning."

"Ok here is your schedule. Just look over it and make sure everything is ok. You start Saturday at 8:00 am." Not really paying attention I skimmed the times just checking to be sure none of them were during school hours.

"These are great thanks." She smiled and looked like she wanted to say more but only nodded.

"Here is my number if you have any questions or concerns. My name is Rose by the way." Rose wrote down some numbers down on the paper and handed it back to me.

"Ok. Thank you, really and my name is Bella." Recognition flashed on her face but she didn't comment only squeezed my hand kindly and then I turned to go. When I got to the door I waved at her and then resumed my trek to the car. Thankfully it was only 9:30 when I got to school.

"Good morning Bella." The secretary greeted me.

"Hello." I signed in without saying anything else and smiled at the woman as I walked out. Right into Angela.

"Oh sorry I didn't see you." She bent down and picked up my bag before I got a chance.

"Thanks." We started toward the next period but I was mostly looking to find Edward.

"So how are you doing?" I sighed which she must have taken as an answer. "Don't feel so bad I'll help out anyway I can." The tears started to form in my eyes again and I knew I had to get away soon before I public humiliated myself again. My class was only 2 doors down and it felt like a sanctuary.

"I know and thank you. I'll talk to you more when I can." I didn't wait for a response, just hightailed it over to room 214, math. I was one of the first people there but that didn't bother me. Until I noticed people looking at me. Really staring. I tried to ignore it at first but then the whispers started and I grabbed my phone and texted Alice.

_Why is everyone staring at me?? _It only took a few seconds for her to answer and I sent a silent thanks to her. Her words stopped my heart.

_They know. _The whole school knew that I was pregnant? I peered around the class and saw almost every set of eyes on me. I resisted the urge to groan. Mercifully the teacher walked in then and claimed the students attentions. For the rest of the time I ignored anyone who looked curiously at me and was out of my seat immediately when the bell rang. Lunch was next but I wasn't sure if that was necessarily a good or bad thing. When I entered and nobody looked at me I decided it was a good thing.

"Hi, why didn't you tell me everyone knew?" Angela looked up guiltily at me.

"I'm sorry I didn't know people would actually act different towards you." Not act different? The kids of the two notorious rival families having a baby not causing gossip? That would be the day. I wasn't mad at her though it wasn't her job to protect me from myself.

"It's ok. Have you seen Edward today?" Suddenly her food became so interesting that she couldn't meet my eyes anymore and had to stare at her tray instead.

"I don't think he came today." I tried to keep the despair off my face but some must have seeped through because Angela took my hand. "I'm sure he'll call you." I just nodded and ate a couple bites of my pizza. I didn't have much of an appetite.

My afternoon classes were basically the same thing as math and I tried my best to pretend nobody was looking at me. I sped for my car at dismissal but abruptly stopped at the edge of the parking lot. Edward was sitting in the front seat of my truck. He didn't notice me at first so I took the opportunity just to watch him. He was staring off into the distance at the woods. His expression didn't change but remained the same sad look. It hurt to look at so I walked over to the passenger side and got in.

"Hey, everything ok?" He turned to me at my arrival but then returned to staring at the trees.

"Bella…" I swallowed when he said my name.

"Yes Edward." For several long, unbearable seconds we just sat there in silence as the other kids got in their cars. Finally he turned his grieved eyes on me.

"Lets get out of here."


	25. Chapter 25

**Sorry the chapters tend to be short I'm going to make sure they are longer from now on. Review please!!! =]]]]]**

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Confusion filled my features as I tried to make sense of what he was saying to me. "Ok…" he didn't need to say anything I didn't want to just sit here in the parking lot. Edward turned to me with a look that made me think I had misunderstood him. "You want to go to my house?" His eyes swung to the front of the car.

"No Bella I mean lets get out of Forks. You and me, lets just go." My brain was slow at processing his words. Leave the only town I'd ever lived in? My family? As irrational as it seemed I laughed. A loud crack of a laugh erupted out of my mouth and before I knew it I was doubled over. It wasn't his words that had been so comical but maybe the way he said them or his expression. I quickly sobered up though when he didn't join in my amusement. "I'm serious. Why can't we? All I want is to be with you it doesn't matter where we are." His words warmed my heart but I didn't know if I could honestly agree to this. Being with Edward like that would be a wonderful life but not seeing my parents or friends again would be hard to deal with.

"I don't know if I can do that."

"It would fix our problems." Damn, he had me there. If we ran away together our parent's fighting would no longer be an issue. "You think about it and I'll be at your house tonight with my things." Without another word he pulled out of the parking lot and onto the highway towards my house. Like last night with Esme I watched all the life around me speed by. Only this time I was memorizing it in case I didn't see it again for a while or ever. Edward kissed me as I was getting out of the car and the few brief seconds our lips were pressed together the world stopped. Unfortunately it resumed when I shut my door and he drove away. The house seemed more empty than usual even though I was used to there being nobody home after school. I decided if I was even thinking of leaving I'd better call Alice. Not a conversation I wanted to have but that needed to happen.

"Bella I'm glad you called." Her concern stabbed me but I kept the sadness from my voice.

"Sorry I haven't called a lot but I've been trying to deal with all this…stuff."

"Things just got worse." Just another reason leaving had so much appeal. Now that everyone thought I was pregnant it would be tougher than before when I told the truth.

"I know." She stayed quiet for a bit then finally she sighed into the phone.

"I'm going to miss you." How could she know? Edward didn't know her well enough to tell her and we were the only two people who knew.

"Why?" Her reply was to laughed humorlessly.

"Come on Bella I know you and Edward are planning to run away together. It would actually be really romantic if I wasn't going to miss you so much." Once again hearing her say this stung. I'd messed up so many peoples lives just because of my foolish puppy love. No, that's not what this is and I knew it. What me and Edward have is deeper than what most people our age share.

"I don't know what else to do." More silence. Not a good sign when Alice doesn't have a solution.

"I know, I understand I'm just going to miss my best friend." Her voice broke on the last word and already I could feel the tears in my own eyes. "Love you Bells."

"Love ya Ali." I used my nickname for her that I only called her on rare occasions. Hanging up the phone broke my heart and I had to wash my face by the time I'd finally stopped crying into my pillow. My mom opening the front door brought me up but I didn't go downstairs. Talking to her would only bring on more tears and I could hardly explain to her what was the matter. I closed my eyes and tried to imagine what she was doing by the noises. A tap at my window snapped me out of my head and found myself staring into Edward's green eyes. Despite knowing that this wasn't a happy visit I couldn't contain the smile that spread across my face. I opened the window and helped him in.

"Did you decide what you want to do?" Ok I guess we weren't wasting any time with hi's.

"Yes. I'm going with you." He just nodded once. I'm sure he knew I would choose that all along.

"Did you pack your stuff." I blushed remembering how I had spent my afternoon crying like a baby. Edward couldn't tell though because I'd made sure to clean my face of any evidence.

"No sorry it will only take a minute." I was surprised at how calm my voice was considering I was scared and heartbroken. I didn't pay much attention to what I was packing, just grabbed as many shirts and jeans, sweaters, anything I could because I had no idea where we were going. Hopefully Edward had at least some type of plan for us. As I started getting books and other things I thought I might like to help remember home I tried to imagine my future, this future with Edward. Something about it made me laugh and Edward looked over at me questioningly.

"Nothing just thinking to much." He paused his movements.

"Are you sure you want to do this Bella?" I didn't hesitate. If I did he would instantly call this whole thing off.

"Yes." Soon we were all set and the sky outside had little light left. We had to hurry or my mother would be calling me to help set the table for dinner soon. I blocked that whole line of thought out. This was not going to be a bad thing, I would make this something to look forward to. Edward climbed out the window first while I put the short note I had written to my parents on the bed.

"Bells, you ready?" I looked up from the paper and walked over to him taking the offered hand. He brought my cold fingers to his lips and kissed them gently. With my bag in hand I ducked down and crawled through, nearly falling into Edward, closed the window softly so my mom couldn't hear and he helped me get to the ground below. He parked the car on the next street over and we jogged there, hands linked, getting in quickly to warm up from the windy chill. As he started the car and smiled at me I thought about my parents when they would eventually read that note I had written them and left on my empty mattress.

_Dear mom and dad,_

_I've gone with Edward, to live somewhere, him and me. I'll be ok I promise. I'm really sorry I couldn't tell you but this is what I have to do right now. Someday I will be back and I hope it's sooner rather than later. Tell Mr. and Mrs. Cullen thanks for everything they did for me. I love you guys so much. I'll call if I get a chance. I'm sorry. _

_Love, Bella._


	26. Chapter 26

**We had been driving for a few hours and my eyes were starting to get heavy but I just couldn't sleep. I looked over at Edward but he seemed as alert as when we started. I opened my mouth to say something until I realized I didn't know what to say. Instead I just laid my head back down on the pillow pressed against the window. Sometime as I was watching the stars fly by I slipped into the blackness of sleep. **

**It was midmorning when I opened my eyes again. To my surprise Edward was still driving although now sleep deprivation was devious on his face. **

"**Let me take over for a while, you need sleep." Not that I had any idea where we were going. He looked over at me and grinned. **

"**OK but let's get something to eat first." At his words my stomach grumbled loudly. We pulled into the first restaurant we came to which happened to be an IHOP. There weren't many people there so we got served pretty quickly. I just ordered pancakes while Edward got a big breakfast of eggs and sausage, hash browns and a side of blueberry pancakes. Apparently I wasn't the only one who was hungry. **

"**So, where are we going?" I hadn't wanted to talk about this just yet but if I was going to be driving I had to know what direction to go in. Edward looked up from plate.**

"**We have a house in Oregon." I kept my face neutral but his words sent a jolt of fear through me. I didn't realize we were going to be so far from our home. **

"**Oh. Won't they expect us to go there." **

"**Maybe but we won't stay there long." I thought about all this while finishing my pancakes. It didn't seem real that I had just run away from home with my boyfriend and we're planning to live in some faraway state. That almost seemed like the actions of a actual pregnant teenager, which I wasn't. The first buzzing from my phone came right as I finished my breakfast. I knew who it would be but I checked the caller ID anyway. Alice. Not who I was expecting but I didn't answer anyway. I wasn't ready for that conversation. **

"**You ok?" I dropped my phone in my pocket and nodded at Edward. **

"**Yeah, I knew they would call me. Maybe I should just turn my phone off."**

"**That would probably make things easier." I brought my phone out again. There was a message on the screen saying I had a new voicemail. I pressed send and placed it against my ear.**

"_**Bella, your parents called here looking for you. They were really worried and I think your dad wants to kill Edward. They went over to the Cullen's house to see if they know where you two went. Be prepared I think they're going to start looking for you tonight. Oh and by the way I miss you.--" "Message deleted." **_

"**My parents found the note, they're going over to your house to get your parents to help look for us." He didn't respond just got up, put the tip on the table and took my hand to go pay for our meal. Swiftly the money was exchanged and we were back in the car with me in the driver's seat. I only had to drive one highway while Edward slept so it was an easy time for me. At least the driving part of it. First I tried to just listen to music and not think about what I was leaving behind. That only lasted about 10 minutes. Eventually I settled on trying to imagine what my parents were doing at that moment. I could visualize him at the Cullen's door in a panic and a jolt of pain rain through me. **

"**Stop." I turned to Edward who was now sitting up alert.**

"**Sorry I didn't mean to wake you." He shook his head. **

"**Bella, stop thinking about what's happening in Forks." I shouldn't have been surprised he knew what was bothering me. My mouth opened to reply but how to voice my thoughts without sounding negative. I didn't want him to think I didn't want to do this with him but if I lied and said I didn't care that would hurt him just as much. **

"**I'll try." **

"**We'll see them again you know. This isn't forever." I nodded grateful he didn't say anything else. I didn't know how much more I could take without bringing on tears. At least I didn't have to pretend I was pregnant anymore. That thought made me pause.**

"**Did you tell them?"**

"**Tell them what?" **

"**That I'm not actually pregnant." His eyes moved to stare out the windshield at the road ahead. For several seconds he just stared out the window not saying anything. Eventually he responded, almost too quiet to hear. **

"**No." I didn't know why but this relieved me. It would have been better if everything was out in the open but I like the idea of them still thinking we were having a baby. That seemed more appropriate a reason to leave then the true cause. **

"**I didn't tell my parents either." **

"**That's probably best." That made me smile, we were thinking the same way. A long stretch of not talking followed. I just stared out at the road ahead while Edward tried to find something worth listening to on the radio. Apparently he was having trouble not thinking about what was happening at home as well. "You want to stop at a hotel for the night?" There had been no words spoken for so long, his finally talking startled me. **

"**Oh, yeah." Absently I turned off at the next exit that displayed there was hotels in the town. That's when my cell phone rang again. I'd forgotten to turn it off like Edward said to before. This time, however I didn't bother to see who it was. My mom, dad, Alice, I couldn't handle talking to any of them right now. Seconds after mine went quiet, Edward's started. That snapped my calm and I grabbed the phone that he was about to press end and threw it into the back seat. It smacked against the seat belt and thudded to the floor. **

"**Bella…"**

"**Sorry, I'm sorry I just--" He leaned over and put his arm around my shoulder. The Hampton Inn sign seemed like sanctuary and I pressed down a little harder on the gas. Thankfully it didn't seem that crowded and I pulled into the first open parking space I came to. **

"**I'll be right back." Without Edward's presence to give me strength I dropped my head on the steering wheel and tried to compose myself. Outside I could hear kids laughing while their parents tried to calm them. Slowly the noise faded until once again their was silence. I hated silence. My eyes began to droop on their own and I had to fight off the sleep my body craved. It was only early evening but it felt like the middle of the night to me. My stomach grumbled reminding me that I hadn't eaten anything since breakfast. The passenger door opened then and Edward held out a room key. I took it while he sat back down. "They told me there's a grocery store around the corner if you want to get dinner." **

"**Ok." Before I even started the car I made sure my phone was off. I couldn't handle much more. One more phone call and my fragile state could easily be shattered. The store was easy enough to find and we only got salads to be as quick as possible. We didn't talk much except deciding what we wanted to have for food. I think he was giving me some space to get myself together. On the walk back to the car I surveyed the surrounding area and realized this was a small town. Besides a small clothing book store, which I may want to inspect before we left, there didn't seem to be many other businesses around. Another small town, just what I needed. When I peeked at Edward he was flipping his phone around in his hand and concentrating hard on something or maybe thinking. **

"**What is it?" He turned to me warily. His expression made me think he wanted to say something but didn't want to cause me any more stress. Too late. "Tell me." **

"**My dad called," I stiffened but didn't say anything "I didn't answer but he left a message. They haven't left Forks yet but your parents might have." My brief relaxation at hearing the Cullen's hadn't left was instantly erased at his next words. My dad would definitely do something rash like jump on a plane that same day to find me. "My father told them to wait until the morning and they would all start looking together but your dad…" He just trailed off but I knew what he would have said. **

"**We should probably leave early tomorrow then." **

"**I agree." Instinctively we both reached out a hand for the other and walked just a bit faster. So much for running off with Edward and living peacefully together. This was turning into a game of cat and mouse. Hopefully they would give up their search soon and me and Edward could just be with each other. **


	27. Chapter 27

The sky outside was pitch black and the room was silent but my mind was in overdrive. When we got back from the grocery store and after we ate I fell into a restless sleep. It only lasted until 11 and since then I couldn't force my mind to stop working. Edward stayed up for a while but at 2 o'clock I noticed he was nodding off. At first I briefly considered going forward with my previous plan of seducing him but eventually decided against it. Still the idea stayed in the back on my thoughts. I sighed and rolled onto my side hoping a more comfortable position would help bring on sleep. My moving caused Edward to follow me wrapping his arm around my waist. He positioned his chin on my neck warming me inside out. With the comfort of Edward's embrace I finally was able to drift off and thankfully I wasn't plagued with images of my parents and home.

Again I woke up mid morning and I was starting to think this was going to be my new schedule. On that thought I remembered that this would mean I would have to drop out of Forks high and then reenroll somewhere else. Just another thing for me to worry about.

"How did you sleep?" My back ached and I was in desperate need of a shower but for some reason I was actually in a good mood. I guess that's the result of feeling the security of Edward beside me all night. However when I thought of it my cheeks blushed.

"Yeah, I actually did." He picked up on my high spirits and smiled broadly.

"Good. I bought doughnuts if you want some, they're on the table." The "table" was only a small office desk but it was plenty of room for a small breakfast.

"Aw you didn't have to do that." He just rolled his eyes at me and offered me a blueberry muffin. Still smiling I sat down across from him and accepted the food. It was delicious and was gone in a few bites. "Mmmm."

"Glad you like it." Even though we were both feeling happy we still knew we had to hurry up and continue our trip. After I helped clean up the mess on the table there was still time for me to take a quick shower before checkout. The hot water eliminated whatever stress I still had leftover from yesterday and it took Edward knocking on the door for me to bring myself to get out. I toweled off and put on the clothes I'd brought into the bathroom with me as fast as I could so that the steam from the shower didn't have time to dissipate.

Finally I opened the door and nearly walked into Edward.

"Oh sorry, everything's already in the car, I just came back to get you." Wow, he really did move fast. I took a quick look around to make sure he hadn't forgotten anything, of coarse there wasn't Edward was thorough, and then we were back in the car. Part of me wanted to check my messages to see if someone mentioned where my parents were but I was terrified at having to hear their voices. It didn't matter who, anyone from Forks would be like a knife to the heart. I wouldn't do that to my pleasant mood, they seemed so rare lately.

"We're actually not that far from the house." Ah, and I was just starting to enjoy this feeling. "It would have been a shorter trip but I got a little lost while you were sleeping." I was glad I wasn't awake for that but I did feel bad for making him find his way without help.

"I'm sorry, you should have woken me." He just smiled. Yeah, I wasn't that great with finding my way around places I wasn't familiar with. The leaves outside the window were many different colors and I passed the time by looking at scenery. When that got old I switched to studying Edward. Not something that could get boring so fast, or ever. He had to know I was looking at him but he never met my gaze.

"Bella I have to tell--" He was cut off by the sound of his phone ringing. I'd almost forgotten to be prepared for that.

"I'll see who it is." I surprised even myself at how calm I was. The ringing had stopped when I finally found it on the floor but I hadn't planned to answer it anyway. The number that had called I instantly recognized. Alice.

"It was Alice." I told him curiously. He flinched. Something was going on. A cold feeling began to form in my stomach. "why would she call you?" Besides the fact that my phone was off.

"Well before we left I told her where we were going." Now I was more confused than ever. Although there was no lack of fear. Would she tell my father? Probably not, she knew how important being with Edward was to me.

"Oh maybe you should call her back." I really hoped he said no though.

"I don't think that's such a good idea." _Oh, thank you. _I made sure my face remained neutral. She didn't leave a message which was also something I was grateful for. If she had no news to deliver maybe everyone was still in Forks looking for me. "Here we are." My head snapped up and looked out the front windshield. The house was another huge one but this house had an enormous open field around it. I couldn't resist taking a deep breath of the fresh air.

"What do you think?"

"It's amazing." My feet moved on their own around to the side. The sunshine overhead was a real treat from the usual dreariness of home. The wind blew my air around and a small giggle escaped me. Edward came up behind me and grabbed my hand spinning me around.

"So do you think you'll like being here?"

"Are you kidding, I'll love it." I left the "if our parents find out and force us to go back" unspoken. Just looking out I could truly feel the freedom for the first time. Without thinking about it I took off. I just threw off the jacket and let my legs fly me across this open land. Behind me I could hear Edward running after me and I picked up the pace just a little. Running wasn't something I excelled at and it was just a matter of time before--. Bam! Right over my own feet I tumbled to the grass. I felt a sharp sting on my arm but other than that my mind was too fumbled to notice anything else.

"Bella!" The footsteps became more hurried until his body standing over me blocked out the sun on my back. Stiffly I rolled over and looked up into Edward's worried face.

"I fell." _Yeah Bella, he didn't notice you tripping over your own two feet right if front of him_. Maybe I hit my head and not my arm. He knelt down and picked up from arm to inspect it.

"Just a small bruise. Let's go inside." He let me lean on him to get up and stayed right by my side the whole way up to the front door after I vehemently argued against him carrying me. So much for independence. The interior of the house was just as breathtaking as the outside and I couldn't help but gape as Edward led me to the kitchen. The electricity wasn't on so we had to open all the shades to let in light. However the bathroom was stocked with first aid and he sat me down at the table so he could gently wrap a bandage around my arm. When he was done he put everything away leaving me alone to return to my ogling of his home.

"You want to see the upstairs?" I nodded and followed him back through the hall and up the stairs. There was 3 bedrooms but he led me right into the first one which I assumed was his. You couldn't tell from the layout though. The room was completely ordinary looking with a plain made bed and white walls. The only thing that distinguished it as Edward's was that there was child's toy piano in the corner. He followed my eyes and smiled

"I'm told I liked the play that thing for hours when I was young." That seemed like him. Although that toy being here meant at some point Edward used to stay here.

"I thought your family always lived in Forks."

"We spent some time when I was really little most likely because of… what happened with your mom." I could tell he was uncomfortable with the subject so I didn't say anything more about it. A car door slamming out front saved me from having to come up with something else to fill the silence. Dread filled me and for a second I couldn't move. Edward quickly snapped me out of it by jetting out the door. I was on his tail instantly but he was already at the door. I nearly stumbled again trying to reach him as he pulled the door open. Standing in the drive way was my best friend.


	28. Chapter 28

We stared at each other saying nothing for the longest time. I guess I should have seen this coming but I've always been a bit naïve. Finally Edward broke the silence.

"Well Alice, nice to see you." Yeah right I'm sure he was thrilled. "What are you doing here?" Her eyes swung over to him and become heartbreakingly sad.

"I just came to tell you your families are going crazy." Oh, so she came to share good news. Her words broke my daze and I rushed down the stairs and threw my arms around her. She squeezed back just as hard which is exactly what I needed at that moment.

"So how are they doing?" Alice pulled back but kept her arm securely around me.

"No tour of the house?" Leave it to Alice to make a joke at this tension filled moment. Just another reason I loved my best friend so much. Edward just rolled his eyes. "Ok Mr. rush but can we at least talk inside." We all sat at the kitchen table with the fast decreasing sunshine as our only light. "You know this is a really nice house."

"Alice!" I could only take so much of her stalling. Better to just get this over with.

"They have no idea where you went but Charlie's recruited basically the whole town." The chief's daughter goes missing, it's not too out there to imagine the people of Forks pitching in to find her. Lucky me. "Your mom misses you but she doesn't seem worried." Her attention shifted to Edward and her voice became just a slight bit colder "Your parents…. are already gone" I jumped up ready to strangle her. How could she not tell me immediately that the Cullen's were on their way here? However, Edward was a little more level-headed than me. He directed his question at her but his eyes locked with mine.

"Do you know where they went?"

"No" This she only whispered.

"Alice, how did you get here?"

"I drove" Edward looked at me confused. Alice voiced the answer to my hidden question "I think they flew." This got him moving.

"Time to go." Before I knew what was happening I was being dragged back to the car.

"Wait! Where are you going." Edward answered her but didn't stop his movements.

"If they're coming here then we need to leave. Now. Bella get in the car." For a second I considered arguing with him. Even though I'd only been there for a little while I could already see myself here with Edward. Waking up in the morning and opening the window to the incredible view, the fresh breeze that blew across the field this house was surrounded by, (the Cullen's obviously at least had good taste.) Not to mention that we'd driven for so long already the last thing I wanted to do was continue but one look at Edward's face told me nothing I said would change his mind. Although this time we had no destination in mind, we only knew we had to drive. No telling where Carlisle and Esme were but no doubt they were close.

"Would you hold on a second! Where are you even going?" It was a good question but Edward wasn't going to let something like logic get in the way of his plans.

"I don't know but we'll think of something."

I alternated between staring at the two of them then grudgingly got in the passenger seat. Alice crossed her arms over her chest and looked at Edward indignantly. It really was a wonder they didn't get along better, they certainly acted alike.

"We're leaving now." He closed his door but I rolled my window down, it didn't feel right just driving away from her like that. Edward pretended he was trying to look for something on the ground but I knew he was waiting to see what Alice would say to this. His patience didn't last long though. He started to back out and Alice jumped up throwing her hands out in front of her. I'm not sure if it was a reaction to her wanting us to stay or that we were about to crash into her car which was behind us.

"Ok ok, if you insist on going fine but I'm coming too."

"Absolutely not--"

"Please Edward." His anger immediately turned to gentility as he turned to me and sighed.

"Fine but you better keep up." He snapped at her, to which Alice merely snorted and then got behind the wheel of her ford. "This is not a good idea." I didn't say a it but her joining us actually made me feel better. It was easier to believe we were going on a relaxing vacation together instead of fleeing our hometown and parents. As we backed out I took one last look at the beautiful house that for a few moments I thought was going to be mine. Sort of. The sun was bright in the sky but there was only a couple hours of daylight left.

"I'm sorry Bella."

"You have nothing to be sorry for. We knew they would come looking for us" He didn't say anything else but I knew he still felt bad. I wished there was something I could say. None of this should make him feel guilty. If anything it was me who should have been the one apologizing. It was my brilliant idea to blurt out I was pregnant. Still I can't figure what it is about me that Edward finds so appealing. So far the I'd done nothing but cause problems for him and his family. "Stop." Edward slowed a bit but kept driving.

"What?"

"Stop the car I want to go back."

"But my parents-"

"Exactly, I want them to find us. I'm sick of lying I think it's time we told them the truth." The car didn't slow any more so apparently he didn't agree with me." In the mirror I could see Alice looking at us confused and worried.

"We'll be right back where we started." That had worried me but we didn't know for sure. I'd hate to think this whole mess could have been solved with a simple sit down discussion of how me and Edward felt about each other. "And Esme?" I knew what he meant. She was still looking forward to us having her grandchild. My silence gave Edward encouragement to go on. "Don't you think us running off together proves how we feel about each other and yet they still want to keep us apart." I desperately wanted to argue but everything he said was true. At least for right now we had no other choice.

"Ok. You're right I guess. I just hate to think of us causing them pain." He wrapped his hand around mine and squeezed.

"I know." Another glance behind us and I saw Alice on the phone. Fear gripped me sharply. Could she be talking to the Cullens? Maybe she only came to find us to report to them where we were going. Upon closer inspection my fear dimmed. She had that flirty look on her face and a moronic puppy love teenager girl grin. A boy. Alice was pretty popular with boys but most of them she ignored. Apparently this was one of the lucky ones that she actually decided to talk to. Her foolishness made me smile. "What is it?" Edward frequently would spend long amounts of time watching me without my knowledge.

"Alice is talking to a boy." He looked in the rearview and suddenly a playful look came into his eyes.

'Hey, do you think we could lose her?"

"Edward! No!" He laughed and pressed down on the gas a little making the distance between us a few yards longer. Of coarse she was too busying to even notice or maybe she just didn't care. More gas. Further apart. It wasn't until we were going almost 95 mph that she seemed to snap to what was going on. When she sped up so did Edward and just like that we were playing chase. "Ok you've had your fun now stop."

"Are you kidding this is fun. There's a turn right up here we could lose her." I couldn't tell because she was so far away but if I knew Alice she was enjoying herself just as much. Nothing would make her happier than to stick it to Edward but catching up with him and then passing him. However this was the farthest thing from what I wanted to do. I squeezed my eyes shut and still covered them with my hands as if that would stop anything bad from happening. Risk taking was not something I did a lot. At least not until Edward, but I would risk anything for him. Without warning Edward smashed on the brakes and made a sharp right. Alice went flying past the street we just turned down but almost as fast made a U-turn and was right behind us.

"Ok Bella, for you I'll stop." Slowly, like I was afraid to believe him, I lowered my hands in time to see Alice onto the side of the road behind us. As soon as the car stopped she jumped out as did Edward.

"Edward Cullen I am going to get you back for that."

"Yeah, don't count on it." As the two of them argued about who was going to be more sorry I thought about how maybe, just maybe, Alice tagging along wasn't such a good idea.


	29. Author's Note

I am so sorry I haven't updated recently but a new chapter should be up in the next day or two.


	30. Chapter 29

"Bella just tell him already" Alice had been saying this to me for the past week. It wasn't that I was afraid, well maybe a little, I just didn't know what Edward's reaction would be.

"He's going to be upset." Alice just rolled her eyes and went back to rearranging the furniture. Again. We finally picked a small town somewhere in Arizona to live at least temporarily. At first I thought living with Alice and Edward together would be awkwar but it wasn't. It had been about a month since we left and finally the calls from home stopped. It was a relief but I would be lying if I said it didn't sting a bit. The rational part of me knew it was unfair to hope that my parents should endlessly look for us but if I was rational I would be in Forks right now.

"So do you think this couch should be under the window or next to the lamp?" Her question brought me out of my thoughts.

"Wherever you think is fine." She stopped trying to slide the heavy couch and walked over to where I was staring out at the field that was our yard.

"Just talk to him. You guys love each other I doubt he can even start an argument with you let alone leave you over this." I smiled sadly at her words.

"Thanks."

Edward pulled into the driveway at 7:00 with a box of pizza. About a week after we moved into this house he started working at the hardware store a couple miles from the house. For now that seemed to be enough money but soon me and Alice would need jobs too. That was fine with me I would have taken any excuse to not sit at home all day and dwell on all the trouble I was causing back at home. When the door opened the scent of cheese and pepperoni hit my nose and my mouth began to water.

"I see Alice decided to confuse me again by moving the whole house around." I greeted him at the door with a kiss and he took my hand as we walked to the kitchen. When he saw the dining room empty he look questioningly at me "Where is our home decorator?"

"She went out tonight so we could be alone for a little while you know...to talk." The pizza slice he had been about to grab got dropped and he turned to look at me.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing I just thought we needed some alone time." While he continued to be unconvinced I leaned around him to grab some pizza and sit at the table with it. It took him a couple minutes to join me and by then my pulse was jack hammering. I was surprised he couldn't hear it even across the table. For the first few minutes we didn't say much which didn't exactly seem like a positive omen for the rest of the evening.

"Bella please talk to me." I set down my food on the plate but I couldn't meet his eyes. All day I ha pictured how this conversation would go but still now that it was here I was terrified.

"I want…we need…I hoped…" each direction I started in somehow seemed wrong. My breathing came out strained and I knew tears would be the next thing. No, I had to do this. Edward was my boyfriend and I loved him. If I couldn't have a simple discussion with him how did I expect our relationship to work. Although this conversation wasn't simple.

"What, what is it you need Bella tell me." It was heartbreaking to hear him so concerned over me but it gave me the courage to go on.

"Edward I want to have a baby." As soon as the words left my lips I felt relieve even if he became furious and screamed at least I had said what I needed to say. However he didn't scream or yell or even say anything. He just sat there. Blink. Blink. Some of the anxiety that had left me after my admission crept back. I knew I shouldn't have let Alice talk me into telling Edward.

"I'm glad you told me Bella. Really." The breath I didn't even know I was holding rushed out of me. "Excuse me." Without another word he left his half finished dinner on the table and walked up the stairs. He left! Before giving me a chance to explain how ever since we told that lie to our parents I liked the idea more and more. Before I got a chance to tell him I loved him enough to have his baby. Before I could take it back and laugh like I'd made some huge, hilarious joke. That's when the tears did come. All I could do was cry I couldn't make it stop. Every time I wiped my wet face it would instantly be soaked again. I didn't even get up from my chair until I heard the front door open about an hour later.

"Bella?" Alice called from the front hall. I jumped up furiously trying to remove all evidence of crying from my face. A hopeless cause, a quick glance in the mirror showed me how red and puffy my eyes and cheeks were. Alice was going to have to be told what happened. But not tonight.

"Yeah I'm in here but I'm really tired."

"Wait but…"

"I'll talk to you in the morning. Good night." Before she had time to question me further I slipped up the second set of stairs we had in the kitchen. The door to the bedroom that me and Edward had been sharing was closed. I didn't go in there though, I wasn't ready to finish talking. My throat felt tight as I passed it to go into the spare room. There was no bed but my sleeping bag was pushed in the corner on top of a bag of useless things Alice got at the local Wal-Mart.

"What are you doing in this room?" I nearly jumped out of my skin. Alice was always able to sneak up on me no matter how alert I seemed to be. Usually her random appearances were calming, however this time I wished she'd taken the hint that I wasn't in the mood to chat. I turned around and smiled as if nothing were on my mind at all.

"Going to bed." She narrowed her eyes at me.

"How did it go with Edward?" For a short second I was going to tell her the truth but the words were stuck on my lips. I just couldn't relive that pain especially since it hadn't yet gone away. My eyes automatically went to the closed door of the room the love of my life was on the other side of.

"We didn't really get a chance to talk about it."

"Bella-"

"We will tomorrow." This time she seemed to pick up my tone. When her continuous staring finally got to me I began setting up my sleeping bag on the floor. On the floor fluff of my pillow I heard her walking back to the door.

"I'm always here for you if you need me Bells." She shut the door soundlessly and once again I was alone. Now that she was gone I felt incredibly guilty for the way I treated her. She was only trying to help and my way of thanking her was telling her to leave. No wonder Edward didn't want to have a child with me. Suddenly exhaustion overtook me and I had to lay down. I switched off the light and opened the window just a crack like Edward always did.

"I love you Edward." I whispered to the ceiling and proved that I had an endless storage of tears as the first of many trailed down my cheek for the beginning of the longest and most miserable night of my life.

* * *

** I am so sorry it took so long to get this up. The next chapter will be up much faster!!.**


	31. Chapter 30

The first thing I became aware of was the fact that it was morning. However the usual bright sun was missing. I opened one eye and could see the trees outside bent into all kinds of odd angles from the wind that must have been pretty strong. Apparently the weather was reflecting my mood.

"Come get it!" I winced at Alice's loud command from downstairs but then the smell of her cooking hit me and my mouth instantly watered. Among her many talents, cooking was one of her favorites. Mine too. Would Edward go down to eat too? I didn't even know what time it was. He had work at 8:00. My emotions were in a complete jumble and I didn't know what to want. No, I knew I needed to talk to him. No matter what his opinion was on the child matter I was glad he knew how I felt. Sleepily I shoved aside the covers and stretched my cramped muscles.

"You know you would have been a lot more comfortable on the bed." Somehow Edward is always able to sneak up on me. As I turn towards him he has a cocky but playful smile. "Sorry if I scared you." His smile increased. I was still nervous about saying anything when we hadn't sorted out this baby mess but his overconfidence is a bit annoying.

"You didn't." I say defiantly and turned my back on him to fold up my sleeping bag. "Guys you have 2 minutes or I'm coming up there!!" Alice yelled from what sounded like the bottom of the stairs.

"Little devil." I hear Edward mumble and I successfully hide my small giggle by coughing but I think he can tell. "You going to eat?" Like I actually have a choice. "Yep." I responded nonchalantly and breezed past him towards the door.

"Bella…"

"Better get there before it gets cold and Alice puts a curse on us." Call me a coward but I wasn't ready to destroy the playful banter me and Edward had started no matter how fake it was. I was out of the room and down the stairs before he had a chance to stop me and try to talk more. Deep down I knew I couldn't keep this up forever but for right now I was happy to stay in a blissful state of denial.

"There you are I was starting to get gray hair." Alice complained as soon as I walked into the kitchen.

"Sorry about your premature aging." I mumbled as I took the plate she held out to me. She just stuck her tongue out and turned back to fixing hers and Edward's food. Really she was a terrific friend to help me out like this and she knew that I didn't mean it when I commented about her being annoying. A second later I felt more than heard Edward enter the kitchen.

"Ah there he is the man of the house." She passed his plate right over my head. I glared at her but she was once again turned toward the counter. Grumbling, I took my breakfast to the dining room and sank into the nearest seat.

"Is that why you're trying to find a job?" I held my breath for a second. How did he know? Last week I had spent all of one day applying for jobs at any place that would take my application. I thought I had successfully hidden this from Edward. I picked up my fork and pushed my eggs into a nice pile.

"Yes." When I peaked up he just nodded at me and took a big bite of food. His face become one of complete content and I couldn't hold off eating any more. Damn little pixie might be irritating but she made some wonderful meals. For a couple minutes we just sat together enjoying our food. Eventually Edward put his fork down on his plate and sighed. I stiffened preparing for the worst.

"Bella, I want to show you something."

* * *

Renee set the full cup of coffee on the table and returned to the kitchen to get her own. Charlie didn't say anything just watched his wife's retreating back. What was there to say? His only daughter had run away from home because of him. And Carlisle. He hadn't seen or spoken to the Cullens in the time since Bella left.

"Charlie…" He looked up from his cooling drink.

"I saw Esme at the grocery store today." She paused waiting to see how he reacted to this news. When he simply stared, waiting, she continued, "they wanted to come over this weekend to try to come up with a strategy to find the kids." Without thinking she had accepted Esme's proposal without even talking to Charlie. Now Renee hoped tremendously that he was ok with the plan. They had to do something didn't they? How could they all just wait around while their son and daughter were off probably starving. And of coarse there was always the possibility Bella was pregnant. When she confessed to it at first Renee was convinced she was lying but now…

"Sure, got nothing better to do." With no more discussion he got up from the table and sank down in front of the TV to watch sports. The phone ringing made Renee nearly fall from her chair.

"Hello?" She answered shakily. Even though she knew it wouldn't be every time she picked up the receiver for a second she prayed it was Bella. Just like every other time her luck wasn't that good.

"Hey Renee, is everything ok for tonight?" Esme. She sighed. Maybe it was a bad idea to let the Cullen's come over. Were any of them really ready for this yet?

"Yeah it's all set."

"Great. Is it alright if we stop by around 7?" Renee's eyes went to Charlie. Any time would be the same to him.

"Yeah."

"Ok perfect…hey, we're going to find them you know that right?" For just a moment Renee paused and closed her eyes. She wished she had the confidence that Edward's mother seemed to have. But she knew Bella, once she made up her mind that someone was important she never let them get away. Even if it meant giving up something else she loved.

"I know." When she hung up she slumped against the wall. Just that short conversation drained her. Maybe Charlie was right about this being a waste of time. Well at least it would keep her busy for a little while. When she didn't have things to occupy her time her mind would wonder. Like right now her thoughts swirled around the idea that her daughter might actually be having a baby. It seemed so ridiculous to even entertain the idea but now her actions almost screamed scared pregnant teen. Pulling all the strength she had in her, she fought back the tears that wanted to escape and quickly went upstairs to take a shower. Behind her she head Charlie shout that he ordered a pizza. Who was hungry?

"They said they would be here at 7." It was now 7:35 and there was no word or sign of the Cullens. For the third time in ten minutes Charlie checked his watch becoming increasingly more irritated each time.

"Well I've waited long enough." Renee couldn't understand why Esme and Carlisle would stand them up like that. It was a complete stroke of luck that Charlie was even still happy enough with them that he was willing for this meeting tonight.

"Wait until 8 at least. Maybe they got caught up with something." He grumbled and sank back down in his usual chair. She didn't know why it was so important to her to talk with them. It wasn't like anything was going to come of this. They had all tried everything they could to get the kids back. First they checked the Cullen's other house but nobody was there. Now there was no other lead as to where they might have gone. For days Renee wracked her brain trying to think of where Bella would even consider going. Hopeless. Even with all the hours late into the night she sat up in bed trying to put herself in Bella's mind were to no avail. Finally headlights flashed across the living room wall.

"About time." Charlie mumbled not getting up from his seat. However Renee jumped up and watched as Carlisle and his wife hurriedly got out of the car and briskly walked up to the front door. Renee had it open before they had a chance to knock. At last Charlie stood and joined Renee at the door.

"Charlie, Renee we're sorry we're late but we have wonderful news." Renee instantly brightened but it would take more to convince Charlie. "We know where the kids are!." That got his attention. "It was an anonymous caller but they told us that the kids are living in an apartment in a small town in Arizona." She didn't want to get her hopes up but it was hard not to almost bust with long overdue happiness.

"You don't know the town?" Carlisle's joy filled face fell slightly.

"Well not the exact one but…"

"Oh so just some small town in Arizona."

"It's better than what we had to go on just this morning." Charlie seemed to think about this. Even though there was clearly nothing he could have done about it, he still blamed Carlisle for what his son did. Yet, it was hard to just forget about their past friendship. Despite everything they had been through he couldn't act as if Carlisle wasn't still in some way his best friend.

"You're right. We better find out whatever else we can. I intend to find my daughter and bring her home. Soon." Carlisle just nodded and followed as Charlie led them all to the dining room. Esme smiled at Renee, remaining at the door a moment.

"You see, I bet by the end of the month we'll have our children back." For the for time in what seemed to Renee like endless months she actually believed they might. That was until she head the next words "and before you know it we'll be holding our grandchild."


	32. Chapter 32

Edward led me up the stairs and the whole way I held my breath. In some ways I knew Edward like the back of my hand but I honestly don't know what he was about to show me. It was a good thing he wasn't talking to me because I don't think my voice would work at the moment. At the landing he paused and looked over his shoulder at me. He seemed to want to say something but decided against it and continued down the hall. I don't know what I expected to see but as I entered out bedroom nothing had changed. That's when I saw it, sitting in the corner in the only small patch of sun coming through the window. It was still windy out but a small patch of light had managed to escape the cloud cover. Automatically my legs took me toward that corner. My throat locked up and I threw my arms around Edward. He bought a baby bassinet. Inside, folded in a neat square was a tiny blanket with the letter E in the middle.

"I didn't know why I even grabbed it when I packed stuff to bring." Only some of his words actually processed in my brain. I was too busy working out in my head what this meant for us. Suddenly the idea of becoming a mother was becoming a real possibility. I leaned back and looked into Edward's eyes already imagining a tiny face with those same eyes staring back at me.

"I love you." Together we returned to the dining room where Alice was just finishing her food. She didn't need to say anything, her face betrayed her thoughts. I told you so. Well, let her brag, nothing could bother me now. A crash coming from the front of the house made me jump. Both of us turned to Edward irrationally thinking he could explain this. He squared his shoulders and confidently crossed through the kitchen to the front living room.

"The wind!" Edward explained from the other room. I relaxed. What had I thought it could be? Our parents had found out where we were and decided ringing the bell or knocking was too civilized? No. I would not become one of those paranoid people that stay home all day and jumps at a knock at the door or a telephone ringing and only emerges once a year to shop for Christmas presents. As I pass the kitchen counter heading to help clean the broken glass, a glowing catches my eye. Just last week I started leaving my phone on and this was the first time it had done anything but display the time. A voicemail message. My heart leapt and I had to swallow back panic. My hand shook as I picked it up and dialed.

"Bella, your father didn't want me to call but I knew I had to. We know where you are. Don't leave just let us get to you. Nobody is going to keep you and Edward apart. You don't have to keep this up. Just come home baby." Those last few words were said holding back tears and it nearly undid me. I ended the call without saving or erasing it. You don't have to keep this up. My mother knows I'm not pregnant. Yet. If I agree to go back I'll lose whatever chance I have of getting this baby. It will be years before they let us be alone in the same room alone again.

"What did they say?" I hadn't noticed Edward watching me and I had no idea how long he'd been standing there. I didn't look at him for fear of losing the fragile control I had secured around myself like a protective shell.

"They know where we are." He sighed probably expecting me to say that. I closed my eyes trying not to imagine the hope running like an electric charge through our parents at the thought of finding us and bringing us back to Forks. At that moment I made a decision, if I was really going through with this I had to harden my heart. I held down the off button and pocketed my phone. "Where do we go now?" He studied my face for a moment.

"I hear good things about New Hampshire." A smile spread across my face. For someone who has never been away from my hometown the idea of going across the country was thrilling. Although Edward could have said the moon and I would have bought a spacesuit.

"Good luck. You have my blessing." We both turned at the soft sound of Alice's voice. If her words didn't cut me as deeply as they did I would have been angry that another person was able to sneak up and eavesdrop on my conversation. It took a minute for her words to register and when they did it felt like a shot to my stomach. She wasn't coming with us? How could we just leave her behind? "You really don't need me tagging along. This is where you head off together." On shaky feet I closed the space between us and drew her into my arms. Tears flowed down my cheeks but I didn't even try to hide it. Alice leaned back still holding onto my arms "You two better pack so you can have a head start." I was reluctant to let go of her but I knew she was right. My father would be halfway here by now. When he sets his mind to some goal he puts every ounce of his energy into achieving it.

"Promise you'll call." She waved her arm at me dismissing my words.

"Get going." Quickly we hurried to our room and bagged up all our meager processions. An hour later the car was ready and running in the drive-way. Me, Alice, and Edward stood in front of the house, wind blowing our hair into our faces making it hard to speak. "I know nothing," she promised for the third time. We decided that when she went home she would tell my parents that we wasn't able to find us so she just gave up and turned back.

"Thank you for everything Alice. I'm going to miss you." I leaned forward for one more tight embrace. Before I let myself break down again I slipped into the passenger seat. Through the window I watched Edward kiss her on the cheek and say something is her ear. Leaving Alice behind felt like surgically removing one of my limbs. Maybe she was right though. This was something just for me and Edward to do. My heart fluttered a bit faster but in excitement this time not fear or stress. Edward filled the vacant seat beside me and backed out. We watched as Alice got behind the wheel of her car and started it. We would drive together just until the entrance to the highway then me and Edward would break off with her going in the opposite direction.

"You ready to build a snowman and wear giant winter parkas."

"Bring it on." That was the only fault with that particular state. The cold and me had a somewhat hateful relationship and me and snow were in even worse shape. But I would live in the middle of the south pole with a penguin as my pet if it meant I would be with Edward. How could our parents not see the way we looked at each other like the sun rose only when we were around each other? How could the scars from the past make them so blind to something that should have been as unbelievable magic?

"I love how the cold makes your cheeks red and your eyes water." Both things which I hated. During this exchange I missed waving to Alice as we got off the main road onto the highway. A minor car accident made the traffic bunch up. Standing off from her car was a woman holding the hand of a little girl who looked to be about two. As we inched by she smiled at me.

"Are we doing the right thing?" It took several minutes for Edward to respond and in the meantime we passed the mother and daughter and sped up toward our new home. Finally he spoke.

"I hope so." Up ahead I watched at dark clouds moved across the sky covering what little sun we were getting.


	33. Chapter 33

The New Hampshire chill seemed to slip under Bella's skin. She shivered even though the windows were sealed and the heat was turned up. In the time it had taken them to drive here they had decided to stay in a cheap hotel until they could find a jobs. They'd saved enough to at least stay for a week or two. She didn't know why but her heart was jack hammering in her chest. Bella focused on everything and anything to keep from letting the guilt creep back up. Edward had been playing mute, only talking mostly to ask if she was hungry or if she needed to use the bathroom. At the same moment Edward went to say something her phone rang. Alice. She had assigned a special ring for her so they would know when to answer and when to not even look. Not that that stopped Bella from peeking at the screen anyway. Sometimes you had to keep poking an injury just to see if it still hurt.

"Hello?"

"Bella, where are you." Until then Bella hadn't realized how much she missed having her best friend with her. She knew being with Edward was worth it in the end but that didn't make the separation any less painful.

"New Hampshire. We're going to find jobs and…" yeah, that was the thing. After that she didn't know how to finish the sentence. Get jobs, have a baby, start a new life? That had been the plan, so why now when she thought about it did it seem so much less plausible?

"I just made it back to Forks. Neither of your parents are here…" There was silence for a few seconds filled with all the words we weren't willing to say out loud. "Good luck Bells." Bella nodded even though Alice couldn't see.

"Thanks." She put the phone down and laced her fingers through Edward's needing the comfort. Up ahead she could see the sign for the hotel come into view. Across the street was a strip mall that would be their first stop in their mission to find jobs. They pulled into a spot and carried our few bags in. At the counter they checked in, with false names of course. Now that they knew their parents were actively out looking for them they needed to be more careful.

"I saw a grocery store we could get some food for the next few days," Edward said as they slipped through the door. The next few days. We weren't positive about how long we were going to be here but it would at least be a week. Bella wrestled with the idea of just ordering take-out but that would just be prolonging the inevitable.

"Ok, I'll stay and unpack." _Coward_, she taunted herself, _you were the one who wanted this_. Edward leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. Just like that the room became as hot as a sauna. She had the urge to pull him back to her and relearn the feel of Edward's lips on hers, his arms around her, hands twisting in her hair.

"Kiss me," she whispered even though he had already swept out of the room. On legs she barely knew how to use anymore she walked back to the luggage and unzipped her bag. While she folded and put away her few shirts and jeans, Bella imagined what living here would be like. A nice comfortable home, somewhat secluded, him going to work every morning while she stayed home with their baby. She could almost see a tiny smiling face with Edward's soul searing eyes and her little peanut nose.

Every bump or footstep made her jump until she finally had to turn on the tv so she couldn't hear anything outside. After all the clothes were in drawers, Bella went into the bathroom and took a shower. The hot water felt wonderful after all those hours sitting in that car. When she got out Edward was back. She watched him line up all the items he bought. There was nothing that needed to be cooked so it was mostly cereal, cold cuts, fruit and some microwave dinners. Back at home Bella always loved cooking for her parents and herself but obviously that wasn't an option here. Edward turned around and smiled radiantly at her.

"You like turkey and cheese right?" She walked over and surveyed the food selections.

"Of course." She took the sandwich from him and sat on the ottoman next to him.

"I applied at the grocery store while I was there." He told her while putting together a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for himself. It seemed like such a childlike meal that Bella hid her small as she turned to him. It reminded her of the day met reminded her of the day Alice. They were both five and Bella had smashed her pb and j lunch as she was hurrying from the playground to the picnic tables along the side of the school. As she lay humiliated on the ground with her ruined food a small hand appeared in front of her.

"Want half of mine?" a voice asked. Bella looked up right into the beauty queen of her kindergarten class. "I got ham and cheese and .." she dug in her small paper bag "m&ms!" she said producing the package of candy.

"Did you buy m&m's?" Bella heard herself ask. If Edward found this strange he didn't say anything.

"No, but I'm sure they sell them downstairs in the pantry." She checked her pocket and pulled out $5 waving it in front of her face and almost skipping across the room. The little pantry with all sorts of snacks and drinks was on the 1st level right next to the front desk. There was nobody behind the counter so she grabbed the candy and paced around the front lobby. Over around a small table was a group of businessmen working over a laptop. Right behind them was the indoor swimming pool. A little boy splashed playfully around, tossing his toys in the air. He turned at that moment and Bella could swear he saw right through the clear wall to where she was standing. She smiled and raised her hand even though it didn't seem possible he was looking at her.

"Can I help you?" She jumped and turned to the young girl who silently slipped back to her post.

"Oh yes I would like these." Bella put the package on the counter.

"$1.50 please." She laid the money down and took the candy and walked back towards the elevator. It wasn't until she want waiting in front of the doors that she realized there was probably a vending machine but it didn't matter now. Just as the elevator arrived that little boy, along with his mother quickly got onboard as Bella held the doors open. In the woman's arms was a baby. She looked only a couple years older than Bella herself.

"Thanks. We're on the 5th floor and this one is heavier than she looks." She indicated the baby as Bella smiled. "Are you here on vacation?" Before she could think it through she shook her head.

"No we just moved here."

"Your family?" Obviously she wasn't fooling anyone into thinking she was older than 17.

"No me and my boyfriend." They reached Bella's floor by then and she stifled her relieved sigh. Even to people she didn't know she hated to be deceitful. Although it looked like that was something she was going to have to get used to. It scared her to think how in such a short amount of time she's gone from a good daughter and student to another delinquent.

"Well I hope you like it here. I'm Natalie by the way."

"Bella." She answered just as the doors closed. Back in the room Edward had finished eating and was now sitting at the desk writing something on a piece of paper. She set the m&ms on her pillow and walked over to his side. It was a job application and without saying anything he held one up to her. The past experience section was already filled out. The top of the form indicated that it was an application for a bookstore. Edward knew her well. Grabbing a pen she sat next to Edward and together they filled out the papers in a comfortable silence.

'So did you get what you wanted downstairs?" She looked over at her pillow. She really had no intention of eating them. Just a little something to remind her of home. In case on the off chance she started to forget.

"Close enough." When they were both done Edward turned off the lamp and leaned back stretching his arms. As she turned to look at him Bella noticed the muscles bunch in his arm.

"You want to lay down for a while?" She knew she had way too much on her mind to be able to sleep but how could she pass up the chance to snuggle next to him. As he sank down onto the mattress he swept Bella onto his lap and kissed her before she even had a chance to react. This was not like the other kisses they'd shared. It was deeper and more passionate. He pressed her back against the bed and lifted her hands over their heads. Fear laced through her along with something else, something just as strong if not more; desire. As the kiss deepened her panic began to slip away. She broke the contact just enough to pull back and smile wickedly as him.

"Yeah, let us relax here a bit."


End file.
